HOO YIK YANG

a silent voice

2010-01-29T17:19:00.002+08:00

Jia wen, ni hui bu hui hen qi guai wei shen me wo hui write this gei ni, qi shi wo write this gei ni you specia de yi shi de o. wo bu zhi dao qi shi dao di ni ming bu ming bai wo xie de thing ying wei wo write pin yin gen English yi qi.
Wo write English pa ni hui bu ming, write pin yin pa hui cuo shuo yi, so wo cai write English gen pin yin together, xiang ni ming bai er yi lo. Wo first time ren shi ni shi zai facebook de message. Na ge shi hou wo shi dui ni write hen shen de English.. wo yi wei zai hin hua school de ren, English yi ding hen hao de but qi shi bus hi >< Chong wo first time zhi dao got Carmen chieong, wo jiu dui ta hen you xin qu xiang yao ren shi ta le but hen mei you xing xin de. Wo zhen de you xiang guo wo wen dao di you mei you ke neng de last time, hai mei gen ni zai yi qi de shi hou. Ni first time call wo shi use house phone de, xiang jiu zhi dao shi ni liao. First time thing dao ni de sound de shi you wo jiu yi jing hen jing zhang, gan jue guai guai le, hen xiang gen ni talk phone. Jing zhang also want talk and wo xiang liao jie gen zhi dao ni de shuo you. Then wo men jiu yi qi wan sdo le. Shi ni dai wo wan sdo de, bu ran wo dou bu ke neng qu learn or play. Na ge shi hou gen ni wan de time jiu man man dui ni you gan jue de and wo shi first time gen nv shen zai game kao dao na me jing de lo. Gan jue hen hao de gen ni play sdo, wo hen xi huan. Last time wo bu zhi dao qi shi ni pei wo wan sdo, play easy de song ni hui hen boring, shuo yi wo cai every time jiao ni pei. Hen xiang ask ni, qi shi ni bu boring de ma? Pei wo wan sdo low level de song, last time. Dao wo dui ni you hao gan de shi hou wo jiu mei tian zai think ni gen dream dou kan dao ni. Wo mei you pian ni de, shi zhen de. Wo first time dui ni shuo wo ai ni shi zai wo fang gong de time then yao shang che hu jia de shi hou. Ni ying gai forget le gua, hoho. Then ni first time dui wo shuo ni ai wo de time, shi zai wan shang wo jiao ni say de. Qi shi zai hen jiu last time ni yi jing zhi dao wo dui ni you hao gan. But ni jiu hao xiang shen me dou bu li and bu believe de then mei tian zai jia jia. You yi tian yudine gen wo shuo le something, gei wo zhi dao qi shi ni shi zai qi pian wo, ni shi you gen ren jiao wang de. Na ge shi hou wo hen shang.. wo zai thing, wo hao xiang you lai bei girl pian le. Wo jiu bu li ni liao. Wo na ge shi hou dui ni hen shi wang. Then ne, ni jiu hao xiang bu li wo gan shou, mei tian zai gen wo shuo ni gen people de shi. Ni zhi dao wo hen bu kai xin de ma ru guo ni tell wo na xie thing? Remember na ge shi hou ma? Wo men first time meet, shi wo first time qu dao klang so far de place, yi ge ren learn go and think zhen yang. Na ge shi hou wo yi jing shi shuan shuo xi huan ni liao de but bu gan qu.. hen xiang tuo ni de shou but bu gan. Gen ni first time go out, wo hen kai xin o na yi tian, meet le hen duo friend, hen hao ^^ Wo bu shi you yi duan shi jian dui ni mei you gan jue, dui ma? Na ge shi hou shi wo dui ni shuo bu chu wo ai ni le, wo gen zi ji shuo, wo hao xiang mei you zai think ni le.. qi shi zai wo gen ni fen liao de na ge time.. wo shi hai you mei tian de zai think ni.. dao le wo men zai meet de time, wo de feel hui lai le  you zai xi huan ni le. Wo ai nib u shi ni ke ai, nian ching or shen me de, shi ying wei wo dui ni you yi zhong hen special de gan jue, hen xiang yao gen ni zai yi qi, hen xing fu de feel. Gen ni yi qi wo cai hui de dao zhen de kai xin. Ni hui gei wo yi zhong hen shuang gen hen shu fu de feel, gen ni zai yi qi zhen de shi hao. Sunway lagoon, ni remember ma? Wo yong yuan bu hui wang le na tian de, shi zai tai kai xin gen wo mei you qu guo, gen jue hen hao. First time gen girl so near de then got yong bao de, but do shen me dou hen bu gan de lo >_< hen xiang bao ni, qian ni de shou, hoho, bu cuo de feel o. na tian gen ni wan de hen kai xin.
Qi shi wo hui everytime think ni hai xiao, hai mei zhang da, yi dian jiu fa pi qi, hen bu chen sou then ne yi dian bu xi huan jiu bu shuang, de bu dao xiang yao de thing jiu hen shen qi, hen bu nai fan and gan jue bu hao jiu hen angry le then ne shen me dou hao xiang hen bu hao de. Wo hui think, qi shi ni you mei you xiang guo this shi bu hao de ma or think xia wo or other people hui zhen yang think or gan jue hui zhen yang? Qi shi girl shi ying gai you this de tai du bu ran jiu bu wan mei. Wo zai zi le there kan dao ni de ying zhi, jiu hao xiang yi dian jiu angry de, dao na ge time wo jiu zhi dao girl qi shi hen easy angry de. Boy jiu shi yao you ke yi ren girl cai ke yi gen ta yong yuan de, dui ma?
Wo you chen jing xiang guo wo men dao di you mei you wei lai, hm.. wo ying gai qu xiang yi ding hui you cai dui. Wei shen me you hui xiang dao you mei you ne? or shi wo hui pao qi? Or shi ni hui pao qi wo? Hm.. wo jiu ying gai bu hui do dao na me chan ren de shi gua.. dang ran bu hui lo. Confirm bu hui.
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Haha, next time cai zai write guo ba, hao xiang mei shen me hao write de liao

[Silent post to you 29-01-2009 5:15 PM] right after a phone call ;)

Disappointed to myself on this post

;)

2010-01-10T15:07:00.000+08:00

this type of feeling is very unique, deep inside the heart.. you wont have any wound or see any blood flooding but you will have the feeling of injuries and pain till you cant breath and your eye will flow up tear even thought that you don't feel like crying. quotes like "Although the wound is bleeding but the pain will fade away as time goes by, wound will recover faster if apply medicine but the wound in the heart is difficult, it is difficult to heal and it might not be healed in a life time" who agree? who believe i make own quotes? geng leh

;(

2009-12-27T02:08:00.000+08:00

just like what i have expected, she will mad when she cant have thing that she want. this attitude really sucks, thought that every girl are same, said by yi suen. obviously it is not.. i dont know what to do now, really, i am so mad and angry. she wanted to have last meet on sunday, so she must want? if not? she must accept is cannot, not everything you want, you can have it. what can you do if you just get mad about it? i dont know how to explain and teach you because you wont hear or realize your mistake. i think this must be de main reason and why i leave her before, it is because i dont understand her enough, whats the different if i know her more now? i cant still change the fact that she is so immature and childish, a very reasonable too and dont know how to think about others difficulty, only wants what she want.. proven that.. each time when she say, i will listen everything you commands, she will no, dont want.

end post for a moment, darn it

remember what i told you?

2009-12-25T12:40:00.000+08:00

?? you just like forgetting something about relationship stuff, maybe you are a bit too young for it and i should admit that i am with a little girl now.. i am just like a suck, with a little girl??

she still haven't really know how to think about someone feels, only think about own.

example,when you do something, dont think about own only, try think about others, you will know more.. let's make an example from myself and what i am experience..

mark this date and read properly, this post is base on myself and correct date.

she is going to go back on Monday, she wanted me to accompany till her last moment to klang, i have no problem with it. okay, her mind and think now is, she want me to go no matter what, didn't about my difficulty.. doesn't ask too.. same like how i find her at klang, didnt even know how much i already sacrifices for her, still think that maybe i am temporarily to her only.

obvious all because i love her, thats all, i wanted her to learn to be more caring, mature, don't always mad on what you cant get, i will love you more if you are good. have to change to be more mature.i already loosed my confidence on helping you for change, it is yourself already, not a lot people can stand it.

hm.. k now, lets see

??

2009-12-25T12:22:00.001+08:00

Hm...

It is like something we cal too over...? I don’t know how to write it in English. Example, everyone know we can’t always fulfill someone wish by their request. Okay, you have what you wanted always now. One day if you can’t get what you want, you will be like, I want, I must want, I don’t care or ELSE. Can anyone understand what I mean? This situation is a bit like her but a bit different. She just want what she want, or she will like, whatever, can’t get then just feeling mad and not good about, won’t have a type of thinking like, can’t have okay, maybe I will have it next time.

Can’t get what she wanted, huh? Once she want, she must want it or.. ;( something like that..

special happy day .. hm..

2009-12-13T23:01:00.000+08:00

my cute honey carmen =) wo de zui ai.. it is a very tiring day, dont know am i able to write a lot or not. i am quite shock when i know jia wen told her mother about me, luckily nothing bad happen, if her biao jie, then finish lu..her mother is a nice person actually but a bit corrupted in attitude and ways of treating, it is a fine one, not ask worse as her lo.

today me go midvalley with jia wen, so happy, then got meet my friend, color wolf, hamsap zai. wo de jia wen is so cute de lo, so many people like her de.

jia wen got come my house also, first time a girl i bring come to my house, she even went to my room and locked too but didnt do anything >< kissed in house =) feel so nice de, then hug, then she got sleep with me, so nice.

at movie, storm rider II not yet finish watch, not bad, quite nice, do something in movie too, hen shuang, thirsty kiss ><

tired tired lu, remark at blog, my memories

...

post end ;)

wo hen ai jia wen o

taste of love

2009-12-09T18:43:00.000+08:00

actually i am a bit upset on the time when pass 12am because i like wishing a lot more than a present.. she didnt greet me also but it is fine because she greet me a lot more than other people. sometime i am a bit cant stand the feel of commanding but it is okay.
my birthday, first time feeling so high and nice, it is on my birthday too, greatest gift!! love you so much, giving me such a nice feel and present. happiest moment in life, highest moment too.
we watches too movie, twilight new moon and JUMP, it is so nice, enjoying watching movie with kissing, very nice, feel very nice.
no one will believe that i almost or already loses my first time or almost, cant write here because it is sx21 hoho, done something very high, i dont believe myself actually try or do it, i really feel high and nice but i cannot do too much because i scare kena ar..
kiss, hug kiss, tight hug kiss, close contact with each other, squeezing, taking off, try try, see see, touch touch, taste taste, put put xD what the hell?

it is my greatest birthday, thanks, short post

no one know my post

2009-12-07T23:47:00.000+08:00

shit browser make me rewrite my blog. there are something upset me and it is repeat again, over and over, i almost fed-up already.what can i do? you are dropping this command, you want to do or not? don't want do then suan, don't want care you. this is okay if it is just for playing. starting, yes, everything is just like playing, time longer, i cant breath anymore, she is choking me to death. okay, don't say the old case, say the current one first. she is asking me to call my boss now or she will ignore me. asking me to take leave for tomorrow, i already told her, boss is not nonchargeable for this because he is not in the office or working there, then i dont have other staff number plus i promise people that i am going to work on 8am, i need to go even if i know later i have to leave for an outing. i really hope i can have a nice birthday outing even if it is late one or simple without anything. darn it, my problem here is, i say it is okay then okay, dont ask me to this and that or you will ignore, okay, suan, not effecting anything.

you done something very wrong already, i know it is good for me but you do it on wrong way, you will slowly minus some mark from you to me. you cant ask or command someone on this matters, you are giving stress and pressure, making someone feel bad and hard. i already listen enough of you, but of course, you are the biggest one, who dare to disobey you? you say what ma what la, ignore me? it is your problem already. 8december2009 end.. + feedback, hm.. you should try understand my feel and problem, you think too much about yourself already and doesnt care about me at all. okay, it is okay..

mental illness insomnia night

2009-11-26T14:08:00.000+08:00

i dont know whats wrong with my lung got problem like last time again but i know and think it is temporarily, wont have any big problem or how. i got a yu gan tell me if got people punch my heart, i might lose my life but boy fight dont beat the heart so fine. actually i can confirm to myself it is fine, no big deal, what can happen to me? nothing.
last night, i think i am having insomnia, long time no kena already because i always have a nice sleep, nothing to be worried, nothing can make me feel hard. but, there are something giving me pressure, she ask me to checkout whats on me. my family and everyone dont do body check because my father is a very kolot and stupid, he hates bla bla checking so same to me, but body checking is okay to me, i like because i can know my body status.
asking me to check, it is okay but i will start feeling stress and having, pressure all bursted up, how am i going to go? do i have enough money, is it free if i go jinjang there? it take a long time? whats the big reason to me to go? it is nothing at all plus wasting time. it is fuck! if i tell my parent i want to go to check check, shit up la. all of them suck, hate them.
jia wen, ni yao jia you, ni bu kai xin or feel bu hao, wo ye hui feel bu hao, wo zhi dao ni shi hen qiang de, jia you.

saturday sunday outing 18/19 october 2009

2009-10-20T20:11:00.001+08:00

"Saturday outing with Carmen, it is my first time going to sunway lagoon and playing water there. learn how to swim for my time on water, very nice!! first time so near to girl, first time a girl on my back. Sunday my first ever date, goes to me with Annie, darn, will it be a bit waste because i am not with my really girlfriend. whatever.. i don't know whether should set my blog to private or not because there are too many things or secret make me cant share here.. damn stressing but okay lar, keep lo"

刘裕扬 Hoo Yik Yang Although the wound is bleeding but the pain will fade away as time goes by, wound will recover faster if apply medicine but the wound in the heart is difficult, it is difficult to heal and it might not be healed in a life time

stupid job and sorry carmen

2009-10-12T17:01:00.000+08:00

"i think i am going to lose a job soon, actually i know i cant work long already but i didn't quit, i need money to survive and i don't want to waste time if i can work. after losing this job, i really don't know what can i do afterward. Annie tell me his company is hiring people, sales coordinator, i really don't have confidence for doing this type of job, so far, i only know how to operate a machine and it is already my profession. if i can have this type of work then nice but not so lucky.. maybe i should try that work if it is find, location is quite near and okay. by the way, i need to have two job too, part time"one more thing, don't know why i felt so sorry to Carmen, not because of cheating her or how, it is my problem, i think i don't like her anymore, not because my heart is change, it is because the feeling is dead, i like to be in single life and want to be single, i have more freedom when i am single, this is what i think. i don't want to effect Carmen examination so i will tell her that i want to break up with her when we meet, i have no choice and i don't want to make her hurt more, okay then, end post"

my first Saturday night in sanctuary 10-10-2009 unforgettable

2009-10-11T09:12:00.000+08:00

"last night, it is my first night going to sanctuary clubbing with friend, my motive and reason for going there is have fun and see only but i am overload, i drink too much till i spin into those dancing. luckily i don't know how to dance shuffle or i already fly there, quite shit when i know i cant dance. i didn't really felt any sorry Carmen last night even if i know i got girlfriend, very disappointed why my partner cant be her but whatever la. the drinks was nice and i feel so damn high and nice, i thought that i will stand only but i dance at there. i don't believe a shy man like me can have a dancing partner, first time experiences it and feel so high. i cant describe my feeling here very it is too nice >< too many story, ask me too call you if want to know more"

i want to hide myself

2009-10-04T19:27:00.000+08:00

"don't know why.. the feeling of i am not belong at here is back, i feel like don't want to stay at here le la T^T i want to keep my friend in home, only anime and life, that's all.. i feel very down because i am too useless and lame.. why am i so this? i don't want to back to my anime life, it make me stay in home always. but, i am still in house always without anime but online. okay now, what am i writing? i feel myself very useless from other, a very useless and tak guna punya.. dont need to proof or how, my life is already very miserable, luen 7 8 jou.. hopeless geh la me.. chat me in msn to know more hyikyang@yahoo.com"

wealthiness attract

2009-10-04T15:49:00.000+08:00

"now i remember something that i see, a very realistic de image, i dont know, am i suppose to write it out but just write ba.. money and wealthiness attract people.. i know what it mean gao liao. i see with my own eye, a person wealthiness will attract people automatically, very geng.. i hope i can own some ability of something always but whatever la.. i am despair T^T cincai la, rich people is like that de, i want to stick to rich people too"

jia wen de ai

2009-10-04T14:16:00.000+08:00

"haha, my bao bei so cute de lo, she write that thing in school, and posted it to facebook ;p she seen to like me a lot and very much and i very appreciate her love to me and i will very love her too >< our time on meeting each other is super less because i got work.. if i dont have work, i can find her always after she finish her school.. being human like me is very despair actually.. mood down liao.. nice image o jia wen^^ xi huan ni"

huh? what a night.. darn..

2009-10-04T13:49:00.000+08:00

"last few day ago Annie asked me to go for a BBQ with her friend, i didn't for any type of place like this, gathering with a lots of people that i don't know, quite hard to get along well because we're different world person but of course there are still way that i can be friend with them, it will be, i am the another type of person to them. so what else? just write some feeling, not my story.. actually i was hoping myself to have more outing with people and i already start to dare myself for going anywhere, my friend ask, i go, that's all. actually i am feeling quite stress last night, seeing a lots of people that very good in talking, why can i be them but actually i am one of them? honestly i am a type of people that talks a lot and joke a lot plus like to make fun and fooling, i just cant get to use it with friend or people that i don't know. quite despair and hopeless, last night before going out, quarrel with my mother awhile, say i am very picky on clothing -_-' what do she mean by picky? i don't have choice to choose. three cans of tiger 5% alcohol level in one shoot, i already feel dizzy on second cans, am i that weak or actually it is normal? feeling despair ma drink la, need reason geh meh? actually i want more but i think i will fall if i drink the fifth can.. whatever.. Annie now, look and attitude still dont really mature yet though she already not like last time but still same.. then the Koo Pui Yee, it already been awhile since the last day i see her, few year jor lo. last night i speak wrong something, actually i wanted to go home early with Annie gah but i say 'fan sin la' then they think i say 'lei fan sin la' so i back home late and give her abandon jor. haih, make new blog liao so there will be more update coming, hoho, my update is random time and day"

19-09-2009 Souji Tendou

2009-09-19T20:21:00.000+08:00

Throughout the series, it’s been noted that the main protagonist, Souji Tendou would always quote from his adoptive grandmother. In other episodes, his step-sister, Jyuka Tendou would also quote from her grandmother as well. To contradict this, Tsurugi Kamishiro had also chipped in quotes from his butler, Jiiya.

Grandmother said this…

Walking the path of heaven, the man who will rule everything.
Make the world revolve around you. It’s more fun to think that way.
When people love others, they become weaker, but it is nothing to be ashamed of. True weakness lies elsewhere.
When not close by, one is even closer.
Chase two birds, and you catch two birds.
People who steal things, lose something even more important.
It is enjoyable to eat something delicious, but the greatest joy is the time spent waiting for it.
If you wish it to be so, luck will always be on your side.
Flowers can make any girl glow.
All girls are equally beautiful.
A knife can only bring happiness when used in cooking.
Fancy flavors cannot hide poor cooking.
It is fun to add a secret flavor so that no one knows. But… it’s more fun to find it.
The whisper of the devil can sometimes sound like an angel’s voice.
One that drowns in oneself will eventually fall to darkness.
Even if the world were full of enemies, there is someone you must protect.
If you receive a little kindness, give them a large serving.
Imitating others is not bad, for it is to recognize ourselves.
Once you know the real thing… you won’t be fooled by an imitation.
Children are treasures. The greatest sin in this world is to damage those treasures.
During meals an angel descends, for it is a sacred time.
There are two things men must not do. One is to not make girls cry…The other is to not handle food crudely!
The sun is wonderful, it can make even the dirt shine.
Life is a long path to a goal. Drop your heavy luggage and enjoy walking with your hands empty.
Men must be cool. Boiling water is but vapor.
The wishes of the children are the future reality…Adults that laugh at such dreams are no longer human.
A bond is a deep connection that cannot be broken. Even if apart, heart and heart are connected.
My evolution is faster than the light. Nothing in the whole universe can keep up with my evolution.

08-09-2009 The answers given to the questions have been shown to have a relevance to values and ideals that we hold in our personal lives.

2009-09-08T20:12:00.001+08:00

You are walking in the woods with myself. myself is the most important person in your life.

You see a dog. The size of the animal is representative of your perception of the size of your problems.

You scare. with the animal? The severity of the interaction you have with the animal is representative of how you deal with your problems. (passively/aggressively)

You walk deeper in the woods. You enter a clearing and before you is your Dream House. It is large. The size of your dream house is representative of the size of your ambition to resolve your problems.

Is your dream house surrounded by a fence? You answered no. No fence is indicative of an open personality. People are welcome at all times. The presence of a fence indicates a closed personality. You´d prefer people not to drop by unannounced.

You enter the house. You walk to the dining area and see the dining table. Around are on and around the table. If your answer did not include food, people, or flowers, then you are generally unhappy.

You exit the house through the back door. Lying in the grass is a cup. The cup is made of glass. . The durability of the material with which the cup is made of is representative of the perceived durability of your relationship with myself. For example, styrafoam, plastic, and paper are all disposable, styrofoam, paper and glass are not durable, and metal and plastic are durable.

You bring home. Your disposition of the cup is representative of your attitude towards myself

08-09-2009 Love test result

2009-09-08T19:40:00.002+08:00

Below are the analysis result

Dear Elric 刘裕扬, below are your love test result:

1. The road represents your attitude towards falling in love. You chose the short road. You fall in love quickly and easily. (very quick end too)

2. The number of red roses represents how much you give in a relationship, while the number of white represents what you expect in return. You give 100% and expect 0% in return. (i give everything without expecting any return)

3. This question represents your attitude towards handling relationship problems. You like to get the person yourself. You are a more direct person and like to work out problems immediately. (that's why when my friend wanted to invite girl to me, i rather find one myself)

4. The placement of the roses determines how much you like seeing your boy/girlfriend. You place the roses on the bed. You like to see him/her a lot. (i will like to see my love one always)

5. This represents your attitude towards his/her personality. You prefer the person to be asleep, you love the person the way s/he is. (this is true)

6. The road to home tells how long you stay in love with someone. You chose the longer road. You will tend to stay in love for a long time. (of course)

too complicated le, this stuff and that stuff, house, work, life, parent, money, ability, my happiness, and my mood, where is it now. feeling down because of small problem, being offend very easily. hate being myself now, want this no this, life is so unhappy.

For Elric 刘裕扬 who have zodiac Sagitarius, below are their perfect match criteria :

Perfect Partners: Aries, Leo
Nearly Perfect Partners: Libra, Aquarius
Like Minded Souls: Sagittarius
Opposites Youre Attracted To: Taurus, Cancer
Learn From Your Differences: Scorpio, Capricorn
Not Your Destiny: Virgo, Pisces
Astrological Hell: Gemini

06-09-2009 stupid useless elric

2009-09-06T19:17:00.002+08:00

i am dead now, something that not suppose to be happen already happen or actually it is normal for guy? now i know that actually i am a very bad guy, i think i will be hurting someone sooner and later. net world, it is not a reality world and it can happen a lots of thing that we don't expect. i am feeling very complicated. slowly ba, very short post for some remind for myself.

私はだれを私が好むが、知らないか知りなさいだれを私が今実質またはないである従って私がそれを確認しなければならないことを維持するelric好むか知っている!!

31-08-2009

2009-08-31T10:38:00.000+08:00

last year, after graduating from my secondary school, the first job that i get is a cashier in computer cent-re. my parent asked me to work for temporarily because they tell me i will be studying next. everyone know computer cent-re job wont be long because salary will not be high so this will be a perfect temporarily job.
(actually my parent never wanted me to study)

working there actually it is not bad at all because i meet a lot people, the amount can be say countless.. too, not going to mention a lot people or this post will be undone. mention some special things then. actually i am a ragnarok player last time when i am in secondary school, ragnarok is my favorite online game, till now i still very like it..
(working there is a bit suck, salary is very low)

i didn't listen to my mother advise at very first when i start working in computer cent-re.. i get addicted back to ragnarok online.. in the game, i meet stephanie ho hui wen. i know this girl for one years already, didn't contact each other much after exchanging number and email. last night i come back very late to home from, when i touches my computer, she suddenly popped up a chat on me, she tell me that she just come back, so coincidence. she tell me that she cut short of her hair already so i ask her to let me see because she don't seen to like her new hair. honestly her new hair style not bad so i praise her a bit, when i am going to sleep, she greeted me good night and tell me she love me >< add a seriously too.. darn, must be fake but she wont cheat me
(she is a bit like my type because of age and attitude she have)

unveil my secret here, no one knows before
few day ago i know a girl call carmen, she study in hin hua, same school with raven. dont know why this girl feels a bit special to me or i think too much, so now i am single, then i can try go after her. girl that i like, can be say as random or any because i dont mind anything if i really like a girl. she is only 14 this year >

cant fully posted, write other day, good night

27-08-2009 下part (end)

2009-08-27T01:22:00.003+08:00

my mother is going to kill me if she know that i am still online at this late hour. i cant sleep now because i want to update this post.

0135

just now i talk on phone for more than one hours, i believe that my phone bill will going to be like hell.. i use my digi number to call a hotlink number..

human is always a type of living things that get emotionate very easily. just like myself, i really feel so uncomfortable till i wanted to cry out, can you guess how stressing am i? and actually whats wrong going on into me? can anyone understand? no, only myself.

i am a very useless guy, dumb and always no confidence to myself, trying to be strong and brave, thought that i can improve myself to be better than always, stronger in anything, but i cant. weak is weak, must accept the true, i feel like crying and i can cry right away.

i am very exhausted now, tomorrow still got work, need to wake up at 0600 to get ready and prepare. what is the time now? i already got three night not enough sleep, tomorrow i will be a very dead at working, hope i can be energetic a bit and fast respond on work.

this type of problem is always very complicated, got one friend tell me that he got a friend that have a very perfect partner, after hearing that, my heart straight away fall.. so it mean i wont have a perfect partner? my confidences level dropped and fall already.

= =
i am too silent recent, no one really know my problem and stuff, even my closest bird don't know whats really happen. i hate flirting and i dont like lying and cheating or not real. i need to change, this is what i know.. no matter how many time i said that, i still will saying that, till now.. dont know when only i can really have the different.

last few day, i tolled someone what i have feel, she just like nothing and okay, i feel so angry because of no respond, feeling down afterward. a stick knife, stick by stick stabbed into my heart with some jealousy feeling. it is not easy to get know to each other to be close like a very close friend. the feeling of jealous and scare someone being take over is really so hard to feels, you only feel pain and crying when yours follow other go.

going to sleep after this
actually it is very stupid and not suppose to be happen or this is what we call things that cannot be explain happened to me? i have gave up a very big heavy bag, now i have another one on my back. feeling so not well

GOOD NIGHT

26-08-2009 上part

2009-08-24T19:09:00.003+08:00

i didnt tell anyone about this, i already start keeping and hiding my problem inside my heart, it make my unmasked me feels down.

maybe i make another mistake about this problem again, actually it is what a kid always do and it is normal. whatever, it do feels uncomfortable.

wanted to forget about it, wanted to tell you, can leave me alone for a moment, let me forget about you in a short time but i cant.

whats going on, elric, work, online and sleep, pass your day with this, dont think so much and know a lot people already. work until age twenty something, collect enough money, do own business.

elric is once again having the feeling of thousand chain in heart, all the chain is entangled, very complicated.

suzuku
to be continue...

22-08-2009 my private post

2009-08-22T16:13:00.003+08:00

August 19
it is a day that i get know to a girl, everything's start with a very flirty way.. hehe, not going to tell how.

finding a young girl as mate always give me a type of feeling like my younger sister or something because i am originally a brother to a lots of people already.

don't know why i always have some difficulty on talking with some people in phone, maybe i am too shy or not normally with calling people that i don't know. there are a day in night, i requested someone for a call to her, darn.. i am feeling so shy.. just feel like listening her voice again, very cute.

finally, a game that i always say want to join but i didnt, i already joined it, it is XDO, dont know why i will want to play it that eagerly, maybe i got people accompany me? haha. it is a very nice and flirty game with a lots of effect in character after typing a code.

i play XDO with Carmen last night, it is my first time playing this type of dancing game, the feeling is quite nice de when playing it with Carmen. i think she will boring if play with me too much, level differences and song level not suit. haha, i make a kiss on her last night

i think i am having a very special type of feeling again, having a feeling doesnt mean of anything, i am not sure about it so lets confirm it and go after it slowly from start.

short post la, praying, no people visit till i make my new post please

18-08-2009 a late night post before bed time

2009-08-18T23:04:00.003+08:00

it already been awhile since the last day i update my blog, there are a lots of thing happen in me, things that is not expected.. luckily so far i didn't make much post at here or this blog will be a very complicated one, actually i am thinking of abandoning this blog because there are too much of stupid post but whatever.. i am still using this, giving up blog is a very stupid things because i will give up all my memory too. just write what i want to write here. actually i am a bit hurry in making this post, rushing for sleeping early, i already told Gina that i will should her my blog so i have to make new post to cover my old post >_< i make too much of stupid post already but i am not going to delete it no matter how, things already happen then just let it be. today is quite fun, actually i plan to do a lots of thing after work today but don't know why it end up with chatting with Gina whole day. i really cant believe that there are someone that made video call with me, just listening to music and voice, the webcam is on but what i see is a desk only ar.. the photo that i uploaded in this post is very long time ago already, my hair already trimed and my hair dont look that that anymore ;p very ugly.. today is my first day feeling so free at working time because i dont have anything to do, just feeling a bit sleepy and tired because of last night, sleep too late already. okay then, i have to end my post now because it is very late already, good night and sweet dream.

Elric 刘裕扬

12-08-2009 dusty blog, wipe wipe

2009-08-12T18:58:00.003+08:00

so long time didnt update my blog already, no mood to update at all
the time and day that i am not updating my blog, happen so much things
actually my blog is one of my memory and diary too, haih.. so many memory not written
so many thing happen but all is okay la
very short de post, i will be back to blog

there are something happen between me and carrien last few day, i thought that it already become an end. i found out that carrien is with another guy but actually no, this is what she tell me and there are no reason for her to lie me. the photo they take is so close, can even be closer than me, when i first see it, i feel so damn pain because i already hurted so badly. the video they record, i heard they calling each other like husband and wife too. actually i already dont want to be with her. tell you all what, i too love carrien already, if not, i already find another one and dont want her. a lot people dislike her, haih..

08-07-2009 physically tired

2009-07-08T23:05:00.003+08:00

sleep on exhausted mode last night, wake up very early this morning.. so sleepy and tired, i already confirm myself of having OT everyday if possible, i got time and energy for it, what i short is mental energy. i never have a proper breakfast every morning, sometime can be nothing in stomach but i problem my lao po try to eat more if possible so that i can grown bigger and not that thin. this morning my father not free to fetch me so i need to get out from my house early for stopping a taxi, an uncle age 70+ fetched me to work, 1936 years, that uncle is very nice, talks to me on the whole way, i am too tired to talk with him. this whole day i act that i am okay to work and OT but actually i already exhausted and very tired, i dont think i can hold it but i will try my best on what am i aftering in future. my work is going very well now, need to learn more and more, the purpose of working is gaining expeerience and learn a lots of things. from my colleague i have learn and know a lots of thing, although his age is not far from me but he is a guy that full with experience on a lots of stuff. from what he say, from what i know, it is true and might be happen. i think twice on it, he is right on a lots of things. my lunch was full, a box of rice, it is damn lots and spicy with some sambal~ my OT is very quick, i mean super quick and mega fast. i feel so fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan fan, i need someone someone someone someone someone someone to talk or share my feeling, how come my lao po can be the one, why..

lao po, i miss you everyday and night, dream of you everytime when i sleep, think of you always when i am only me, as girl, i know girl will always hope and wish for thier guy be with them everytime, for me, i have the same thinking, i want to be with you always and everything, possible, i want to be everday. i am on a very serious mental exhausted mode, i hope that you can be the one that make me feel relax and fine back, a talk will help. you must always remember this, i am now sacrificing on work.

07-07-2009

2009-07-07T19:59:00.002+08:00

Today i wake up at 7am and it will be always. Last night, finally, a call has been made, Carrien will never know how happy am i or she don't know that i miss very very badly. I sleep at 5am if i am not wrong, only 2hours of sleep, went to cheras with my friend again, get caught by Carrien, she know i sleep very late because of going out with friend. Last night is cool and fun but less one people, actually the person that have been left over, he is a quite guy and can't get attention by friend, his mouth will only open when we ask him something. There are a girl call Ah Yee, she say i am a coward in real life, shy and quiet, like to talk big and don't dare to do anythings. This girl mind didn't update, who know that if i am not or i have change? Or i can be a very talkative and wild person? I can lie her just like what i have lies, i act that i don't know what is a kiss with tongue. This is very common and of course i know, i am wondering what it feels. my lunch today, it is GREAT FULL!! i am thinking of working OT and night shift now, experience needed on a good job, work hard for it then.

carrien, i will be working for OT from tomorrow if possible, i need to gain more experience and time for learning and i will be very tired in physical. working on night shift, do you think it is fine for me? time will be less, my working hour will be your not working time and your working time will not be my working time. someone tell me something today, related to a meaning call filter. okay then, short post, good night to all

06-07-2009 almost forget to make post

2009-07-06T21:31:00.002+08:00

Wake up a bit late after 7AM today, very tired, last night having some headache that make me feel so exhausted. This morning eat only a piece of mini moon cake then drink something. My current mood is a bit down, don't know whats wrong, actually my work is fine, i like it so much and i will stick to it, it is nothing to do with my job if i am feeling down. Feeling down because of miss someone very badly? This is serious, i am telling everyone that i miss Carrien so much. It is just like, example "if Carrien is in front of me now, i will run to her, hug her tight and cry" this is only some example. I am type of people that don't know how to express mood and feeling. Nothing effect my emotion on working today, done quite well nothing wrong happen. I already qualify for working OT mean i will be working for 12hours a day, can earn more money and gain more experience. If my parent agree, i will slowly work for OT time, i will do anything for experience and money. Working 12hours a day is hell, very abnormal but it is on weekday time so i think it will be okay. Need some agreement from parent, then ask my lao po see how, the work is really very tiring and not easy, use a lots of brain and energy. People always say guy always look younger than women, if i work this way, i think i will look equal with Carrien, wont look younger, it will be great then. When i look younger than Carrien, i will feel like i am still kid. I will make myself got a looks like an adult, go in casino without checking identity card. Hopefully on age 18 or 19. My lunch for today, rice with meat slice, green chili pepper and crab stick, i am SO full with the lunch box! Do you think i got chance to make a lunch box for lao po? Or she will make me one. See lo. Is there any place that me and Carrien and be together a day in weekend time, i mean a place like vacation or something, can stay a day together every weekend. Need to make some plan on transport and more. A guy like me, didn't go out before, what also don't know, so useless. This morning when i am looking for a clothe to wear for work, i noticed, actually i don't have a lots of clothe to wear and i never buy clothe before, all the clothe i wear, it is some DONATE from cousin neighbour and friend. This time i really must have some outfit shipping. I always say i want to save money, what am i aftering? Actually nothing but now, i want to have a car, i want to bring lao po come kepong more often. If i got car, i will be able to do anything and go anywhere, freedom is mine! This is what Raven wont have, freedom, LOL! I will have freedom after owning a car! Cool! Elric jia you! I will try my best to own a car BY this wear IF can and got ability. Wait for me Carrien, it will never be long. today after work, i call carrien two time also not people pick up :( never mind lo..

want to have more time planning one some outing that need a day to spend time together every weekend saving money for a car in future call you always no matter what love you

05-07-2009 short post

2009-07-05T22:53:00.002+08:00

wake up very early today, online whole day, i suppose to be going out with my lao po but didn't.. headache!! need to make post daily.. work time really making me feel so stress, although the work is easy and simple, memorizing and more, it is killing me.. i can die, i need lao po a lot :( tomorrow work again, jia you elric, need to sleep early.

There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year's course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.
About suffering they were never wrong, The Old Masters; How well they understood Its human position; how it takes place While someone else is eating or opening a window or just walking dully along.
For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.

04-07-2009 i dream of you again

2009-07-04T17:04:00.002+08:00

today i wake up very early, i dream of lao po again, i still cant think any outing activities with her but i really miss her a lot, i am thinking of going to her house but will i interrupt her parent Sunday resting and family day? that day i go because of being requested.. as long as i can be with her, anywhere will be fine, my work make me feel so stress.. a lots of pressure on memorizing and controlling a machine. no professional teacher and people that teach me is too complicated, although i am clever until dont need to write down some note but i still feel very scare of crushing machine. today i go to work at a bit late but on time, dont need to wait for a long time till everyone reach there. yesterday i already start to control the machine, today i continue my job and finish a model already then extra time nothing to do waiting them to set new parts program. i call lao po after work today, no one picked up again, i will still call her everyday after work. after work i went back home, online until now, so damn boring, tired and sad. my friend ask me to go clubbing tonight but, i dont even have the ability for outing, still want to follow them go? if i got money, i will go for an outing with lao po if course, i already miss her until want to sick. the work make me feel sorrow.. i will stick this job tight no matter what. good night to all. whats my outing with lao po tomorrow, i think dont have :(

"sobbing" i cant go out tomorrow i guess, dont have ability i guess.. try my best if can, wanted to see you so much, want to have some private time together on some talks and more, think of going her house is a bit too late now i guess, maybe i can plan it for next week. i will try my best, work hard to gain experience and life!! first month of working of course it will be a bit hard and tight, jia you ELRIC!! ROAR dumb guy

03-07-2009 myself and my dream

2009-07-03T07:22:00.003+08:00

this morning i dream of my lao po, told you that i miss her so much and wanted to see her right, after wake up, i feel so down and sad because the dream have end :( but never mind, i know slowly later i will have ability on see her EVERY WEEK. so what dream i have this morning? sorry, don't really remember but i will tell it by parts

someone took my phone away to snap photo then when my lao po call me, she say she want to see me right now and quick, at the time i am on genting with parent so it is impossible for me to appear in front of her so i promise her that we will meet after i am back.
i am walking in a very fresh place in genting mean someplace that not exist, thinking back the first time we meet and slowly went back too the place we have go.
i really cant think a lot, although the dream said that i am on genting but it is very complicated because i know i got see my lao po in dream.

my body, there are something wrong, not going to reveal or tell everyone, maybe i am weak or thin, thats why this thing happen to me.. i feel like there are a pressure from lung to my heart when i stretch my body, i mean i cant stretch my body because i will feel a pressure from my ribs to heart. my whole body just like damage, including my brain. "will i die if i stretch my lung even if i feel cant breath and so suffer + pain" i dont know, i just cant stretch my body already.

my heart feel a bit pressure from my lung and ribs when i stretch or move my body
both of my arm, used over strength, muscle is hurt and injured, from the pain i feel, i will be fine on next month
my leg, feeling more and more pain and tired because of standing, maybe i should train more so that i leg can be strong, i need the leg energy for some use on something
breakfast, chocolate oat drink, drink water, eat and drink nothing until 12.30PM then drink water lunch, rice or anything then eat and drink nothing to 7PM then only dinner, the time when i am in home, i need to drink a lot water and eat a lot
i sleep 12am+ from july1 already, when can sleep early after a call with lao po ne, my sleep will without worry and sweet.

today my father not free to fetch me so i must go out super early for taxi, scare that i can go to work on time, need to spend money on third day already, don't know will my father really start lazy and don't want to fetch me then he will ask me to spent almost RM10+ a day for taxi and food. i want to work and, learn a lots thing and raise my salary quick!! this my the way of my living now, live hard to get something!! no matter how exhausted i get, i don't mind, i can risk my life on it!! of course i will only take a risk, i will not sacrifice, maybe i will, no i cant, there are someone important for me to be take care. love her so much >_< Finally, i can control the machine at last, just not enough skillfull and a bit dumb because of not enough sleep and tired, i miss my lao po so damn much till i can dream of her last night. The learning and controlling is okay, need to absorb slowly and quickly master it, this is what i want, must master the machine. My whole body is aching including some inner organs. Lunch, a dumplings and few piece of cake, i will be hungry very quick, save as much as i can but try not to effect my health. Don't know why everyday i need to disturb people i only feel happy, just some simple disturb that can make people angry and got smoke come out from head. I don't mean to disturb, just wanted to make myself release some feeling of numb on brain. Everyday on lunch time, i will have extra more than half hour times, i am thinking of converting some video to phone and watch. I am downloading masked rider kabuto recently, got time to download, no time so watch so i will try to save it too phone and watch. Masked rider kabuto is a very nice series with handsome japanese guy that look cool. How i hope i got a friend like him, i don't mean my other friends don't look good, LOL. "ROAR" my friend didn't call me out for a long time already, i want to go to cheras with then but i got work now. I am thinking, and wanted to plan, is there anyway for me to be with lao po whole day till night, either staying go home, out for a vacation or to a resort in someplace.. This coming saturday and sunday, lets have a plan then, midvalley will be the easiest for me. after my lunch, everything goes fine, learn slowly absorb slowly but must master everything quick, i feel so damn stress, a lots of pressure, i scare i will make mistake, i scare i cant master the machine. today after work, i mean why this three day after work i call my lao po also cant get through.. i will call everyday. tonight i MUST sleep early. show you the machine that i control in my working place

"this weekend de outing plan le ma? i want to see you so much o " i don't know where to go or should go yet, out for a movies, or how leh. i don't have car so it is a bit hard and cant go much place, my father say he will get me a car quick, hopefully by this year, i already cant stand of CANT see lao po, work hard a bit then i will get car quick, my father only do some simple support. jia you!! the dream i got last night really making me T^T when i wake up, i can feel that my soul is away from my body.. don't know where it wonder already.. "ARGH" i should plan all those outing right, darn..

02-07-2009 second day~

2009-07-02T19:56:00.002+08:00

Same like always, i am going to wake up everyday on 7am for the rest of my working day including sunday. Didn't eat anything for breakfast, drink some chocolate oat drinks. Now i noticed that i really don't have anythings to wear even for work or outing. I never went out on purpose for buying something for myself to wear. I don't go to shopping or buy anythings. When i am going to change my shirt for work, i really feel so angry to myself, darn, i can't find anything to wear, only a grandfather shirt with collar available. How am i going to continue this. My bag too, i am wondering, when am i going to change.. I reach my working place early again. My father fetch me here early. Tomorrow i am going to come myself with taxi. Today learning is okay, more quicker but still need time. Hope that i don't do any mistake on it then everythings will be fine. Every half hours on lunch there will be a short a short guy conferences that talk about anythings other than work. It is a bit boring on time after lunch because i don't have interest on their topic. How should a guy be, wild or gentle. Night life, alcohol, girl and low percentage type of drugs. This is a life that what youngster should have? I can't think of any others life things for relax other than some simple outing. I am just a bit curious on those life, not interested on joining. What should i think and do now is, learn and mastery those machine quick, save more money to myself and for myself. I want to become machine leader, something like nothing do to anymore, just teach and guide. after my lunch time, after gaining some weight from lunch, i feel so tired of standing, my leg just like want to break or something.. i feel so pity and poor because they are not teaching me in proper way.. things that i learn, all by common sense and memory.. today at last i can start to move a machine slowly by guide, still got a lots too learn, there are something that i am so scare of "can i mastery a machine and become a leader quick so that i can (sit don't, don't need to do anything? it will be a long time if i cant mastery every skill of it quick. my purpose of working is i want to mastery every single machine and know everything at there. i don't mind of doing nothing after i mastery everything but i am really scare of i cant learn anything because it is really damn hard to memorize, not easy at all but from what i know, they can guarantee me, i can mastery a machine by this saturday.. hope la.. "ROAR" i am going to call my lao po everyday after my work time and time before sleep, i don't care anything now, just want to hear her voice more, scare that i will forget her voice because of hearing those machine sound. her sound will always be in my heart though that i can get to call her. how i hope that i can have OT with those staff, i don't mind of working until 9AM if OT, what i want is experience and salary. i will try to eat more if possible, i am telling every single one of human that living on earth, i am going to try a hard way of gaining my weight. don't want to look thin and weak, want to grow big a bit then only will suit my lao po de ma, right, i don't care any genetic things, i am going to try a hard say, eat none stop.

after working, i will eat less and drink less water, i hope that it will not effect my health a lot. i cant call lao po tonight, although it is a bit :( but never mind lo, got chat a bit with her, i already didn't chat or talk with her for a long time, i think few day only but i already feel that it is very long time already. i asked her for a outing this weekend, i miss her so much and hope that i can see her, how i hope that i can chat online with her using webcam.. it will be very nice, i will buy two if i see some cheap cams. i already try chat using webcam, it is damn stupid and funny, feel so weird.. i hope i can chat with her using webcam, it will be soon and quick. "if saturday or sunday free then we go out le wor, any problem ma lao po, i want to see you so much, what about you, got miss me" LOL~ good night and sweet dream, muacks

01-07-2009 my first day working life

2009-07-01T20:34:00.002+08:00

i am back to my blog life, today i wake up at 7am, i will be waking up on 7am everyday from now. i feel so sleepy and a bit cant awake because i sleep very late last night.. around 12am if i am not wrong. last night before sleep, carrien give me a miss call on phone so i call her back and have some talk, miss her so much. this morning i went to my working place very early because my father is not free on the time at 9am so i must go early, when i reach there, i get a bit confuse and unsure because all door and gate are locked, it is already 8.30am but still haven't open any gate yet, my company start working hours on 9am but i am the only one that reach first. i walk around the building and more just to recognize the location and area of my working place. i didn't take any breakfast this morning but i got drink something of course, chocolate flavor oat drinks, it is very good but a bit too sweet for me, i will stomachache if i didn't drink well at morning. i got a bit don't like the ways of learning today, much of the people there don't know how to teach, they just ask me to see and learn, it is a bit hard because what i do is see, i don't even know what to ask if i don' t know. they should be teacher me step by step, not by asking me to see.. actually i can mastery a machine in two day if they teach me but they don't. whatever, i got salary even if i sit down and do nothing, just see. i really hope that i can learn to control a machine quick, mastery this machine and let me to by my own. i want to learn all the machine there, i really hope and wanted to do that, i don't think it is impossible, it is the only way for me to be success. today, i just learn a bits of thing, don't even really know something but better than nothing. it is a bit hard to communicate with them because all also "bo tak ceh" (didn't study) it is okay, i will not be lazy for the work, i will stick at the company, stick at the machine and learn till i mastery everything. a lots of people tell me, it is not easy to learn at first but slowly will get use to it, AT first, it is really hard to learn a damn shit things, they say i can master it on a week or something, i hope la.. the way they teach is really making me confuse. lunch time, my mother buy me nasi lemak at morning for me, quite full but not enough, i want to talk to carrien so much on lunch time but i think she is not free. i take 15minute for lunch, 45minute for rest and do nothing.. no one here accept me.. so sien.. that's why i say i want to talk with carrien. after lunch, then continue learning my things slowly by watching, thats all i can do. i stand more than sit, leg is a bit tired too.. some people there got OT, a newbies like me no OT till i know how to control a machine then only got OT~ after work.. i straight away call my lao po, she ask me to call her after work but no one pick up, never mind then, i will make a call to her before sleep <3

when is our last time meeting each other, it is on Sunday, last month, last two week. don't know why this few day i feel so.. MISS YOU so much, i can even see you in my dream, can count as every night if you believe it, it is something like a image of you, although that we don't meet each other that much but i always hope that we can have more time together. i got a lots of thing want to tell and ask and share and show and say and do. this month i have to save a lot, i think i cant spend a lot for this month. if this month i am not able to go out with you, i will want to go out with you on next month, we will go to a place for a day of something and leave out a unforgettable memories, T^T useless guy say this thing. whatever~ must happy always. elric love you

The 100 Most Important Things To Know About Your Character

2009-06-30T00:40:00.002+08:00

The 100 Most Important Things To Know About Your Character

Part 1: The Basics

1. What is your full name?
HOO YIK YANG

2. Where and when were you born?
MALAYSIA, KUALA LUMPUR

3. Who are/were your parents? (Know their names, occupations, personalities, etc.)
HOO POH KEONG, TAXI DRIVER, SO HOT HEAD, MY FATHER

4. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?
I GOT TWO SIBLING, THEY ARE LIKE MONKEY

5. Where do you live now, and with whom? Describe the place and the person/people.
I LIVE IN MALAYSIA, KUALA LUMPUR, KEPONG WITH MY PARENT, IT IS A VERY NICE PLACE, LIVE WITH MY FAMILY, FATHER, MOTHER, ME, BROTHER AND SISTER

6. What is your occupation?
A TECHNICIAN

7. Write a full physical description of yourself. You might want to consider factors such as: height, weight, race, hair and eye color, style of dress, and any tattoos, scars, or distinguishing marks.
I AM 175CM, 45KG, HAIR COLOR ORANGE, EYE COLOR BROWN, A LAME STYLE OF DRESS, NO TATTOSS, NO SCARS OR ANY DISTINGUISHING MARKS

8. To which social class do you belong?
I AM NOT IN CLASS ANYMORE

9. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?
I AM A STRONG GUY

10. Are you right- or left-handed?
I AM RIGHT HANDED

11. What does your voice sound like?
DUCK

12. What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?
WHAT THE F*CK

13. What do you have in your pockets?
MONEY AND IC, MAYBE THERE ARE MORE STUFF

14. Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?
I LIKE TO STARE AT PEOPLE AND SMILE, LOL

Part 2: Growing Up

15. How would you describe your childhood in general?
VERY BITTER

16. What is your earliest memory?
IN SENTUL TIME

17. How much schooling have you had?
TWO YEARS KINDERGARTEN, SIX YEARS PRIMARY SCHOOL, FIVE YEARS SECONDARY SCHOOL

18. Did you enjoy school?
IT IS GREAT, MORE ON PLAYING WITH FRIEND

19. Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?
I AM USELESS, I DONT LEARN ANYTHING, DONT HAVE ANY TALENT AND ABILITY'S

20. While growing up, did you have any role models? If so, describe them.
I AM NOT THAT GOOD AND FAMOUS

21. While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?
HUH? QUARREL MORE THAN SITTING QUIETLY FOR DINNER

22. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
A HERO THAT CAN SAVE THE WORLD BUT THE WORLD IS TOO PEACE, I HOPE THAT I CAN HAVE A SUCCESSFUL LIFE

23. As a child, what were your favorite activities?
SPORT WILL BE GREAT

24. As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?
A VERY RUDE MANNERS OF PERSONALITY

25. As a child, were you popular? Who were your friends, and what were they like?
I AM THE MOST POPULAR DURING SCHOOL TIME BECAUSE I AM SPECIAL

26. When and with whom was your first kiss?
DIDN'T KISS ANYONE BEFORE

27. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?
I AM STILL A VIRGIN

28. If you are a supernatural being (i.e. mage, werewolf, vampire), tell the story of how you became what you are or first learned of your own abilities. If you are just a normal human, describe any influences in your past that led you to do the things you do today.
LAST NIGHT, I GET BITE BY A WEIRD UNIQUE AND SPECIAL KIND OF BAT, THE NEXT DAY WHEN I WAKE UP, I FEEL THAT I GOT A VERY SHARP TEETH, FEEL VERY THIRSTY TOO..

Part 3: Past Influences

29. What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?
STILL NOT YET HAVE THOSE EVENT YET

30. Who has had the most influence on you?
NO ONE BUT MYSELF

31. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
A SUCCESSFUL LIFE WITH A HAPPY FAMILY

32. What is your greatest regret?
NO, DONT HAVE

33. What is the most evil thing you have ever done?
KILL LIVING THINGS

34. Do you have a criminal record of any kind?
NEVER, I AM A GOOD GUY

35. When was the time you were the most frightened?
CANT REMEMBER, I THINK NO..

36. What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?
NOTHING IS EMBARRASSING

37. If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?
I LIKE THE WAY OF MY LIFE NOW

38. What is your best memory?
MY FIRST DATE

39. What is your worst memory?
STANDARD ONE LIFE

Part 4: Beliefs And Opinions

40. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?
OPTIMISTIC OF COURSE

41. What is your greatest fear?
NONE EXISTING THINGS

42. What are your religious views?
NO COMMENT

43. What are your political views?
NO COMMENT

44. What are your views on sex?
IT IS.. I DONT KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN LOL

45. Are you able to kill? Under what circumstances do you find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?
REVENGE

46. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?
OPERATE A DEAD LIVING BODY AFTER KILLING IT

47. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?
YES I AM

48. What do you believe makes a successful life?
WORD HARD, TRY THE BEST

49. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings (i.e. do you hide your true self from others, and in what way)?
I HIDE A LOTS OF THING ABOUT MYSELF, WHO KNOW THE REAL ME?

50. Do you have any biases or prejudices?
NO

51. Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances? Why do you refuse to do it?
SINGING OR DANCING, I AM SHY

52. Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?
I WILL DIE FOR LOVE

Part 5: Relationships With Others

53. In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)? Does your treatment of them change depending on how well you know them, and if so, how?
I TREAT EVERYONE GOOD

54. Who is the most important person in your life, and why?
CARRIEN, BECAUSE SHE IS MY EVERYTHING

55. Who is the person you respect the most, and why?
LETS SEE, SORRY, DONT HAVE ONE

56. Who are your friends? Do you have a best friend? Describe these people.
ALL PEOPLE THAT I KNOW ONCE, IS MY FRIEND, I DONT HAVE ANY BEST FRIEND, FRIEND I GOT, MOST OF IT FORGET ABOUT ME.

57. Do you have a spouse or significant other? If so, describe this person.
NO

58. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened.
I FEEL SWEET

59. What do you look for in a potential lover?
FEELING

60. How close are you to your family?
NOT VERY

61. Have you started your own family? If so, describe them. If not, do you want to? Why or why not?
DIDNT THINK OF IT YET

62. Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?
A ZOMBIE, NO ONE WILL HELP IF I NEED THEM

63. Do you trust anyone to protect you? Who, and why?
NO, BECAUSE I DONT KNOW WHY

64. If you died or went missing, who would miss you?
MY LOVELY CARRIEN

65. Who is the person you despise the most, and why?
NO

66. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?
I DONT LIKE ARGUE, I WILL KEEP QUIET

67. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?
YES I AM

68. Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?
YES BECAUSE I CAN MEET MORE PEOPLE AND GET MORE SOCIAL

69. Do you care what others think of you?
YES

Part 6: Likes And Dislikes

70. What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes?
ONLINE OR WATCH ANIME

71. What is your most treasured possession?
ANIME

72. What is your favorite color?
BLACK

73. What is your favorite food?
ANYTHING THAT TASTE GOOD TO ME

74. What, if anything, do you like to read?
I LIKE TO READ BUT I DONT LIKE TO USE TIME TO READ

75. What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?
ONLINE

76. Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?
NO, I AM A GOOD MAN

77. How do you spend a typical Saturday night?
A DATE TILL LATE AT NIGHT IF POSSIBLE

78. What makes you laugh?
A LOTS OF THINGS

79. What, if anything, shocks or offends you?
I WILL FEEL MOODY OR CRY

80. What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?
I WILL TRY MY BEST TO SLEEP

81. How do you deal with stress?
RELAX

82. Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?
I LIKE PLANNING

83. What are your pet peeves?
DONT FEED

Part 7: Self Images And Etc.

84. Describe the routine of a normal day for you. How do you feel when this routine is disrupted?
NOTHING

85. What is your greatest strength as a person?
DONT KNOW

86. What is your greatest weakness?
NOTHING

87. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
CHANGE A BIT FATTER

88. Are you generally introverted or extroverted?
I AM OBVIOUSLY A EXTROVERTED

89. Are you generally organized or messy?
MESSY~

90. Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at.
LAZY TO NAME THREE THINGS~

91. Do you like yourself?
NO

92. What are your reasons for being an adventurer (or doing the strange and heroic things that RPG characters do)? Are your real reasons for doing this different than the ones you tell people in public? (If so, detail both sets of reasons...)
IT IS CHALLENGING

93. What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?
BECOME SUCCESS AND HAVE A HAPPY FAMILY OF MY OWN

94. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
I DONT WANT TO THINK YET

95. If you could choose, how would you want to die?
SLEEP UNTIL DIE AT OLD AGE

96. If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left.
TOGETHER WITH MY LOVE ONE TOGETHER WITH MY LOVE ONE TOGETHER WITH MY LOVE ONE
TILL THE LAST MINUTE

97. What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?
MY LIVING

98. What three words best describe your personality?
COWARD STUPID DUMB

99. What three words would others probably use to describe you?
COWARD STUPID DUMB

100. If you could, what advice would you, the player, give to your character? (You might even want to speak as if he or she were sitting right here in front of you, and use proper tone so he or she might heed your advice...)
ANYTHING LA, WASTE A LOT TIME ON THIS 100 QUESTION ALREADY

24-06-2009

2009-06-24T19:53:00.002+08:00

I am stupid or what? Actually I feel something not right from the day I stop writing my blog. There are something that I want to tell, explain or make it clear. This blog, mainly wrote for some explanation for my relationship matters. Lets see, there are a guy name TKY from Singapore, I don’t think I will reveal his real name anywhere. He scare his identity revealed then he will be what? I don’t know, I don’t like putting a mask on face, mean hiding own identity by a nickname or something. So what about him? There are something that I can be explain about him, it is really complicated. From the day I know him, it is already one year I guess, I know him in a game server, I use to be a abnormal guy in chat, something like, like to make fun and more. Some single will always hope to be in relationship but some don’t, last time, I give TKY a very bad personality I guess, I mean last time. Why cant his thinking to me update a bit? Mean I am not the old me already, I have change. I don’t know when will be get insane spreading thing to spoil my image again, luckily I know that he wont read my post so don’t need to send him any message from this post. He tease a lot on facebook and chat, telling people that I am something like playboy and something, there are something that I always want to ask, the first thing, never mind, why don’t you show me the proof that I got a lot msn girl contact, or show how popular am I among girl in facebook? Show me or count me, how many girl that I have add in every place. Just give me a proof on what I say and don’t simply tease a people, I will start to tease you back very badly. Almost forget, I didn’t explain something yet, i don’t think I want to explain it, it is my pass, no use to say a lot. It is something like a blank post, whatever. Now I love a girl so much, today I dreamed her, I already forget how is the dream but the unforgettable part, it is the last scene, I hugged her very tight till I wake up. She is Carrien, my lou po zai.

Nothing much to comment or write, I am very happy with my life now, tomorrow I am going to watch movie with my friend.. I want my first time to cinema is with my love on but it is okay, Carrien will still have the chance to be my first girl on cinema. Hope that my outing for tomorrow will be fun.

13-06-2009

2009-06-12T17:40:00.010+08:00

june10
finally we are out from the car, reached genting skyway cable car parking place, you know what have i see? Carrien is so short, shorter than me, almost a head of height. her parent dont seen to be short to me but she is very short, bring me some feeling of cute. at very first, we dont really talk a lot, i feel a bit like being dump or abandon. luckily i am going with her, Carrien family bring quite lots of thing to genting. i will slowly get more confidence to myself when i am with her more, change braver and more man. at the cable car, on the way up to genting, talk a bit with Carrien. actually we are planning sit all together but there are still people that hop up. Carrien sister is very pretty and nice, giving us a free ticket for theme park, help us book a room too.. we wait her in cable car area there. actually i already see her sister before if i am not wrong, see in photo of course. Carrien showed me her chinese new year photo once and i remember it till now, thats why Carrien cousin sister look so familiar. we should thanking Carrien cousin sister a lot for the room booking and theme part ticket. it is indoor and outdoor ticket, not cheap too. after meeting Carrien sister, we walk our own to first world hotel lobby. almost lost because of dont know where. the time, on elevator down to lobby if i am not wrong, suddenly someone hold my hand, guess who, at that time i am a bit shock because it is my first time holding hand with a girl that i love. honestly last time i got hold and touch girl hand before, just normal touch and hold. try imagine and think, there are A LOT people in lobby and the number that we got, 368 by 152.. mean the current number is 152 and we get 368. auntie ask us to go and play first while waiting the room to be checkin. the time is afternoon if i am not wrong, before we go to play, we go for a walk at inside, slowly cut through and go in theme park, we play nothing at the time, there are too much people in the park, almost EVERY game is full and need to wait a long time to play. we just sit down and eat something, share a a box of fried rice and two stick of nugget. at that time, Carrien so bad, she know my appetite is not good and cant eat, she bite a bit the nugget and bait me to eat, haha, i finish it. from what i know about Carrien, she choose not to eat or eat less to diet, it will effect her health and actually we dont have to eat less to diet, what we need is control our food eating habit and time, it is the most healthiest way for me and dont need to be starving. she dont eat will make her cant eat a lot, she eat less will make her no appetite to eat, if eat a lot, she will vomit. i am quite pity about her, i dont mind if she dont diet and eat more. i really miss the moment when we are together, it is very great. later when it is almost time, we went out of theme park and have some walk. Carrien say she want to try the spiderman things at outside, it is so cool, i feel like flying, too bad that i cant see the front well or it will be great. Carrien is a lefty if i am not wrong, she like me to be on her left side more when holding hand. i cant write much of my memory here because it is too much, i only will write what i remember. lets see what i present her, a thick jacket that got feather, a pair of earing, a hair ribbon and.. i think thats all i guess. i will upload photo that i left out in here. my favourite moment, only short time, june11 other breakfast, on bed, i am the one that grab her hand first ;) thats all, all my photo, facebook + blog
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=30185870&l=1bfb468a61&id=1487357364
this is a photo that we snap on first day at indoor.. floating flying ship, i dont really know how to express on photo ;p
my emotion dont really look like that, just stunned by capturing
my eye so small and emo~
another emo eye
her brother pick this sit and ask me to snap photo, so great (^_^)v
this is a nice shoot yo
genting view = hotel
stick closer next time ;)
although it is a dark image, quite nice
another view
she like to play tongue, lol
i ask her bother to snap photo too sudden le la
i am a good photo shooter

ah hao look other side already ar..
this photo is a great shot ;)

very nice tower

xD she put down her zip already
i like this photo

this apek, who is him?

x(
see uncle look so lonely

11-06-2009

2009-06-11T20:29:00.003+08:00

june 10
i wake up at very early time for going out to genting, my planning is kepong ktm to kl centrel then from there to genting. this is what i want to do at very early time. i feel that myself is a bit lucky because i can get a taxi at early morning time to kepong ktm. the uncle tell me, go from other place will be quicker but i dont know how, what i plan is, kl centrel to genting there. actually i lost in kl centrel, dont know where to go.. a bird guided me, chirping me the direction and tell me what to do. i take quite long time in kl centrel, wondering around, think of how.. carrien asked me to sit bus to somewhere but luckily i haven't decide and confirm yet, a long with the chirp of bird, with carrien idea, i sit ktm to rawang from a very long way..
i snap this photo in train when i am on my way to klang, so sleepy and tired.. a bit boring too, carrien called me few time asking me how am i now.. i feel that she is a bit scare of meeting me but she have to meet me to confirm our love. at very first, i feel so stressing when i am about time to meet her, i scare i will dont like her but dont know why, my heart beat so fast, i feel so nervous. actually this is what we call, love in first sight. she dont really talk with me much when we meet and i am trying to stick her, her parent is quite funny and good too. we went to genting by the cable car, genting skyway.

make part two of this tomorrow, current time 11pm so sleepy

09-06-2009 fragile

2009-06-09T15:29:00.003+08:00

don't ask me anything about this post if possible. don't know why will i have this kind of thinking, i feel that myself is a bit meaningless. not because of some matters of problem but it make me feel like i cant decide something by myself yet, until now i still need to pass the adult but actually in officially saying, age 18 can be call as adult. it make me feel a bit down and i got think to make a short term disappearance to all of my friend. i don't know when will i disappear or hide myself, it will be on anytime, no one will be able to make any contact with me till the day i appear. maybe i will not appear back to anyone in future or something. i feel so weak, it make me want to hide myself. do anyone feel that i want to leave? what i want is hide myself from light, store myself in darkness. i really feel so useless. i can feel very sad so easily, suddenly or any small thing.. it is a bit same when i am getting mad too, can be easy if my mood is not good. just a short post.

08-06-2009

2009-06-08T10:02:00.003+08:00

Sorry dear, i can't promise you to sleep early now, i want to write this blog so i hope you can understand.

Current time 1:34 AM about my previous post, i realized something, Carrien didn't lied me anythings, why am i feeling sad is she didn't think to show me her look at very early time. So now i have accepted her late showing image of her. I am going to ask dear checkout some photo of mine at facebook so that she will confirm my look. I am poor, i don't have work, didn't study, i am dumb, i am stupid, i am quiet, i don't know how to talk, i am not handsome, i got a lots of pimple, i look so sleepy every time, i always not enough sleep, i am so thin and i am so tall, my hair look lame. Hope she don't mind. Going to end my post. Good night.

edit
a straight relationship to couple, we don't really friend yet, i hope that we can understand each other well till forever. i dont really have much confidence about this, i really scare you will mind the useless me plus i am a guy that will cry, i am so useless right. i will try my best to be a good boy friend, promise

08-06-2009

2009-06-07T23:09:00.003+08:00

just now i went to jusco, actually i am think of buying a happy card from jusco or change my call plan to postpaid, i don't like to make call with worrying my calling credit. i feel so down after i forget this important things. actually today my mood is a bit not good, i feel a bit like crying too. this morning carrien show me some photo of her, she look very mature, really, i am not lying. i will love her no matter how she look like i dont mine, i feel like she want to lie me but i know, she will be honest with me, i will believe every word she tell me. honestly i cant accept what have she show me today, i dont mind how she look. i feel like she dont want to let me see or know how is her look till the day we meet. i know, at last she still let me see how is she look like but i really feel a bit dont like and uncomfortable. i will be crying if everyone is on bed now. carrien, i love you. i feel so unhappy and i dont know how to say or mean it. i am sorry. i dont mind how you look but i mine that you show me so late and didnt think of showing me before. i just feel a bit uncomfortable with this.

my parent, yesterday say okay, can fetch me to carrien house, now my parent say, dont go and tell carrien now. i dont want and i want to go, i want to meet carrien. i am feeling so down about this, my parent never support me for everything that i have choosen, it is anything. they tell me a lots of reality stuff too, it is ancient story of love. my parent say i will be abandon and she would like me. my parent say what else if she dont look as same as photo. my parent tell me a lot of stuff and i didnt say anything and mute, i will argue with them if i say something. i am not a good guy, i hate my parent, i dislike my parent, i quarrel with them because i dont like them. they disagree me to go now, i will try my best to meet you, i know i am dumb, i know i am inexperience plus this is my first time on date and meet parent too, i will be very nervous, after all i am still a 18years old kid<

you have offend me, i know you dont mean it, i hope it wouldn't happen anymore, i am really feeling sad about this

07-06-2009 sunday <3

2009-06-07T10:36:00.005+08:00

last night happen something that is very awful, i feel very sad about it and i feel like crying, i don't know why i feel so no confidences to this relationship, maybe it is my first time on relationship. at very late time, me, ron, joey and carrien is in a conversation in msn, our chat is very normal at first, ron and joey is chatting about novel and me, i just keep on interrupting ron and joey chat. ron and joey haven't know that actually i am in love with carrien and she is my girlfriend, when we are on the middle of the conversation, ron and joey suddenly feel weird and noticed that me and carrien is weird. ron and joey suddenly say i like raven before then i like another girl again when they know i like carrien.. i don't mean to hide anything of myself and pass, i wish to tell her all my things too but i just don't have the time yet. i feel so relief after she forgives me . this morning, she send me few photo of herself, it is some photo that she snapped on chinese new year time, she tell me that she is fat and look ugly, if i really love her, i will never mind on how is her look. honestly, she look very mature and adult to me, my mother say the feeling can be different if we meet up. what i want is a confirmation of my feeling to her. i feel so happy and very touches because there are a girl love me so much. i hope that our feeling is real and our relationship can last forever. i am now your boyfriend, i am your dear, i am your lao gong.

last night when carrien is angry with me, ron and joey got help me say something good and hope that me and carrien will be okay. they say i will cry if she don't forgive me, the true is really i will cry but it is too shy to tell that. when carrien is on a chat with joey, carrien tell me that joey like me or something.. i really don't know that, what i know is she hate me so much. i hope that she is okay. in text world, i am very stupid and like making fun or disturbing, sometime i might offend people too, i am so sorry about that to all.

my parent, when did they start to be that stubborn and hard to talk with.. i already forget when is it. my parent never understand me from kid time, they don't know why i cry, why i angry, why i can study well and more. they care me but they care on wrong way. in my child age, there are too much of misunderstanding things happen, i will not forget it, why own children thinking and feeling also don't understand, i really don't have any idea about this. until no and today, everything is still same. i tell my parent i got a girlfriend already, i want to go genting with her family on wednesday, they say why so fast meet her then why go genting with her parent. my parent say, i don't have anything, shoes or shirt, all don't have, including money, my parent say no money don't think to have any girl first.. haih.. i know they got their reason and got its right. from what i know, they never say something that's is good, i mean example on my side or support my thinking and way, they never do or think that.

carrien tell me that she want to read my blog, hehe.. hope my blog is okay..

edit post

i feel like actually you should be telling me early or showing me early, i feel a bit scare and unsure that we wouldn't get a long well, i never expect or think, how is my girlfriend in future plus i don't really mind if i like ;)

06-06-2009 <3

2009-06-06T16:53:00.004+08:00

there are a girl call Carrien, i know her not more than a month of time, at first, we don't really know each other, normal short chat on facebook only. we slowly go into some long chat and exchange our phone number. me and her, it is something like fate that have been make out. i use to be a very shy boy, i don't dare to make call to unknown and more but i have called her in a very short time after she asked me. i feel so happy and warm when we are on phone, there are a type of feeling of "i don't want to lose you" actually i never expect that an relationship of couple can out that quick in a short time, honestly i love her so much now. last night, when i am on chat with her, i accidentally make offend with my word. afterward, i call her.. when we are on phone, i asked her "why will you love me" she say it is because of feel. she confessed me that she love me and she requested me to be her girlfriend, it is what guys normally do to girl. i feel so touching and have some short tears falling moment, i feel so happy. Carrien is the only girl that loved me so much, i will promise her to take care her well forever and wouldn't her upset with any matters. i am a guy that not really good in expressing my feeling and i am not very good on talking too, i don't know how to say much of those sweet things. i will never lie her and i will be honest to her. it is my first time, telling a girl on phone that i love her, she is my first girlfriend that i have, i love you so much, Carrien. she asked me a lots of question, it is something like testing me too.. i am a bit dumb and don't know what to answer but of course i got tell her, she like my answer. i will share some question that she asked, "you kissed with any girl before" of course no. she ask me, "do you mind that i take away your first kiss" of course i will answer, i don't mine, she is my girlfriend. she ask me "can i kiss you" after she ask me this, she say "what else if i don't want to kiss you" i tell her that i will kiss her, either in public or anywhere. we planned to go genting and stay one night, only our two, renting hotel to stay in same room. this is what she suggested and ask me, it is okay for me but i am worrying on something. although that i am a dumb guy, i watch a lots of drama, listen a lots of thing and know a lot, even anime got teach, it is too obvious. a couple, in one room, stay over night together, what will a couple do? HONESLTY i don't hope that we will happen anything, i am quite agree on having those after married. what am i worrying about is, i scare that she will *request for it, don't me when i say no, angry with me if i say no, beg me for it or try anything for it* i am really worrying about this when we are on genting. i want to be with her, i want to be together with her. by the way, i ask her out for gathering at time square, i hope she can go with me and have fun with me at there.. i she want to go.. going to end my post

Carrien, we will be together forever, i will make sure that you will be the world happiest girl, although that i know i am poor and i dont really have much ability for much things but i will do what i can and what i afford. i dont know whether will you understand my blog or will you read, what i want to tell you is, lao po i love you

post even

post edit
going to genting together is what we want, i think i am going to genting with her family this wednesday, i am so nervous

05-06-2009 CC is her nick

2009-06-05T09:15:00.004+08:00

i am 1990, age don't even reach 19 yet. i am type of people that like girl that is older than me but of course it is not about maturity. i like girl that is older and have a very cute young heart, i found that that this type of girl is quite attractive for me. when did i start having this type of mind thinking? i don't really sure when. i know a girl name Carrien Chong, i know her in facebook, she born in year 1988 mean she is older than me at least two years. from what she tell me, she have a boyfriend before. she tell me that she already been single for more than a year and she is hoping to get new relationship. she don't mind of having a 1990 guy to be with her. for me, i wouldn't accept a quick relationship like straight to couple, i will slowly get to know her in real life and slowly from friend to closer relationship. i don't have experience at all, i am a bit worry about this relationship too. what scare about is, she will mine about me.. i think she got a bit like me ;p last night we have a very long phone call, my credit.. used RM20+ on CALL.. around RM23 for 1hours and 10minute something.. then next call is around .. forget.. call two time.. T^T credit is so damn pain but it is worth, count as an experience for me then.. i never been a call for that long with a girl ;p she is.. haha. last night when i make call with her, i feel so damn nervous.. when we are on the phone, honestly, her voice is so soft and not easy to listen and know what she talk, i will slowly get use to it if we are having a lots of call. she is a bit cute to me, telling me she is jealous and more, ask me who is estelle, why treat her so good, haha. promise not to do those anymore ;p last night conversation is very nice :) it is my first time talking with a girl for that long. last night conversation is so much and too much.. she help me find a work on newspaper, read and let me hear. she say she will help me ask her employer for a work too.. distance, she suggest me to live with her, LOL ;p whats more.

okay then, i am going to end my post now, i like her when she say she is jealous xD

04-06-2009 new blog

2009-06-04T11:28:00.001+08:00

A brand new look for my blog, i don't think there are people will know or understand how difficult for a blog edit. I hope i can get more visitor for some comment about my blog template. It is really a very tough edit. Sometime i don't understand why people don't want their blog to have more stuff, is it because of complicated or you don't know how to set? Most of the reason i get is, why must i put or i want my blog to be silent or no comment. When i ask again, another reason will be made. Honestly it is not that complicated if you have a lots of stuff on blog, what we need is arrange. I feel quite satisfy with my current blog, i already made a very big edit from the original look to the current look of the blog. I don't expect any comment, saying that my blog is so nice, how you make or what. I just want to let everyone know i don't copy people blog layout to use, i just take the original one to edit. The blog that i am having is unique and no people will have it. Next, i am going to edit the color, i am wondering, what color should my blog be, red, blue, green or current color? To make my blog become more unique, i will edit the color.

I readed Shirley post at last, actually i already know what she going to write when i read the blog first few sentences. The possibility of them, being together, is very high, although the disagreement of Shirley parent is very tight but i don't think there are no hope for it. Shirley must be strong, don't give up, i don't believe that you wouldn't get something you want, the guy of course. For the gathering, i am going to attend no matter what will happen. I don't think she will visit my blog anymore, just make a wish and hope to her then.

I am feeling damn down, the feeling that i am having now is damn sad. My heart, crack like a class, trying my best to hold myself from yelling, hold my tears from falling.

To Ron, you are not reading this right, IF i bu suang you, i will tell the world i love you and we are gay, if you continue spoiling my image, i will gay you until you be guai. Ron, i love you.

Erica, haha, she is so cute, send me so many love, heart and kiss to me at facebook^^ thanks a lot. For estelle, sorry.. This few day i don't really have the mood to play pet society, promise you i will buy you a lots of gift when i am back to pet society.

x( i love my current blog so much! Good night, current time 5:10 AM june4

03-06-2009 facebook tag

2009-06-03T21:58:00.001+08:00

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 100 Truths about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

(To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, copy and paste this note, erase my answers and enter your own, tag people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)

WHAT WAS YOUR:
1. Last beverage : plain water
2. Last phone call : so many month ago
3. Last text message : so many week ago
4. Last song you listened to : japanese song
5. Last time you cried : going to

HAVE YOU EVER:
6. Dated someone twice : never
7. Been cheated : yes
8. Kissed someone & regretted it : kissed my sister, no regret
9. Lost someone specia l: someone that i lost, surely is not the special one
10. Been depressed : always
11. Been drunk and threw up : i cant be drunk

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLOURS:
12. BLACK
13. WHITE
14. GREY

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU (2009)
15. Made a new friend : net friend a lot
16. Fallen out of love : ya
17. Laughed until you cried : gaki no tsukai tv show does that
18. Met someone who changed you : yea
19. Found out who your true friends were : so great
20. Found out someone was talking about you : they say i am useless
21. Kissed anyone on your friend's list : i will, please wait
22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life : 0.1% of it
23. How many kids do you want to have : this year too late already
24. Do you have any pets : never
25. Do you want to change your name : ELRIC KAYSER
26. What did you do for your last birthday : not yet
27. What time did you wake up today : 12pm
28. What were you doing at midnight last night : online until 4am
29. Name something you CANNOT wait for : rich
30. Last time you saw your Mother : now
31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life : stronger in mental
32. What are you listening to right now : TV
33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom : no
34. What's getting on your nerves right now : gathering
35. Most visited webpage : http://www.facebook.com/
36. Whats your real name : HOO YIK YANG
37. Nicknames : shh..xiao yang for chinese, eri in english
38. Relationship Status : alone
39. Zodiac sign : sagittarius
40. Male or female : 50/50
41. Elementary? : sktk
42. Middle School? : smkkb
43. High school/college? : pipala
44. Hair colour : orange
45. Long or short : tall
46. Height : 175+ CM
47. Do you have a crush on someone? : no
48: What do you like about yourself? : nothing
49. Piercings : tongue
50. Tattoos : on neck, a snake
51. Righty or lefty : right handed

FIRSTS:
52. First surgery : whoa, no
53. First piercing : np
54. First best friend : no
55. First sport you joined : high jumping
56. First vacation : no
58. First pair of trainers : no

RIGHT NOW:
59. Eating : no
60. Drinking : no
61. I'm about to : T^T
62. Listening to : TV
63. Waiting on : sleep

YOUR FUTURE:
64. Want kids? : 3
65. Get Married? : 1
66. Career? : yea

WHICH IS BETTER:
67. Lips or eyes : eye
68. Hugs or kisses : hug
69. Shorter or taller : shorter
70. Older or Younger : older
71. Romantic or spontaneous : spontaneous
72. Nice stomach or nice arms : stomach
73. Sensitive or loud : loud
74. Hook-up or relationship : relationship
75. Trouble maker or hesitan : trouble maker's

HAVE YOU EVER:
76. Kissed a stranger : other people de baby
77. Drank hard liquor : beer? yea
78. Lost glasses/contacts : not yet wear
79. Sex on first date : not yet
80. Broken someone's heart : yea
82. Been arrested : almost
83. Turned someone down : dont know
84. Cried when someone died : not yet
85. Fallen for a friend? : yea

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
86. Yourself : no
87. Miracles : not on me
88. Love at first sight : not on me
89. Heaven : not me
90. Santa Claus : i am sata cows
91. Kiss on the first date : not on me
92. Angels : how i hope

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time : no
95. Did you sing today? : everyday
96. Ever cheated on somebody? : yea
97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go? : now
98. If you could pick a day from last year and relive it, what would it be? : now can already
99. Are you afraid of falling in love? : yea
100. Posting this as 100 truths? : 100% not true

03-06-2009

2009-06-03T00:10:00.002+08:00

A complicated life with a complicated mood and feeling. I think i am going for the gathering for next week. Actually i really hope that meet someone at the gathering, i am a bit scare of showing myself too but i want to go no matter what. I don't know what will happen when i attend the gathering, can i really enjoy well and forget everything? I hope i can forget everything and enjoy the gathering. Short post for today.

The flowers are set alight
Sparkling, dancing, releasing a blue dream

Two petals from the fireworks of dreams fall quietly in the sky
Did you, who went away to the other side, see it too? It's the same light

And
Even if the two are apart, I believe that they'll come together again someday
I'm singing to you, singing of this love that tears my heart apart, can you hear my voice?

It's fireworks, bursting in an instant

Bloom proudly, way up high
Sparkling, dancing, releasing a blue dream
The love that protects us rings out in earnest
At least it will be strong until the end
The flowers are set alight

All kinds of words scattered abot mischievously
And the confusion that rooted me to the spot quietly disappeared, can you see

Tomorrow?

It's fireworks, bursting in an instant

I grasp the sparkling, dancing flowers of dreams
As they rain down into my hands
Let my love ring out to you like I wish it to
If it's going to be over, at least let it be strong
The flowers are set alight

It's fireworks, bursting in an instant

Sparkle, dance, send up a blue dream
Someday we'll meet
You, me, and the love that joins us
We'll be strong together, forever

Bloom proudly, way up high
Sparkling, dancing, releasing a blue dream
The love that protects us rings out in earnest
At least it will be strong until the end
The flowers are set alight

01-06-2009 y!am

2009-06-01T17:46:00.003+08:00

June 13 y!am member is having a gathering at time square, i am still thinking, should i go? can i go? am i free to go? i don't have any outing just like that big before. i don't have any nice clothe to go, honestly, i don't even have a shoes.. how shame is it, i got make some imagination of myself when i am at there, of course it can be very fun if i can get use to their environment, i can be type that is very active and joke a lot in real life. how many personality in my heart, it is countless and no one will know, i can be very silent and moody, i can be joker or i can be talkative. i hope i can go who the gathering, i scare that i cant get use to those gathering mood, i scare they will play true or dare with me, haha, impossible~ i dont say anything about that game then no one will know.

i already feel a bit frustated about something, i know i am not qualified to feel that and this is what i should deserve, i dont mind or care about it because this is what i must have and feel, so i must accpet the fate and true of it. there are something that i am weird about, i feel like those y!ammers got a bit fishy on something, they seen like knowing something about me but i didnt really spread anything. i dont think there are people that know about it but how come? they read my blog? i dont think so, they will laugh at my post if they does. i am wondering and weird. elric, dont down about it.

ending post
aftering girl dont seen to be difficult for me LOL haha, i dont talk sweet stuff because i dont know how to lie.. haha, got few girl got chance, i found another 1988 and she gived me her number, i didnt ask..

i dont really feel like aftering them

shh

31-05-2009

2009-05-31T10:09:00.003+08:00

Current time 2:30 AM just finish chatting with kathy, a new friend. At first i thought that i can ignore and forget it, don't know why when kathy remind me of something of it, suddenly i feel *miss* i don't know whats wrong with it, i don't know what's happen, i don't want to ask, and i don't want to know. I wouldn't force anyone. Until now, i am still telling myself, are you crazy? Do you know what are you thinking now? Just forget it elric, try your best, let it be and stop lying yourself. I want to hold my fish night and punch hardly to fall now! Elric! Complicated. Short post.. I don't want to write much.

29-05-2009

2009-05-29T12:02:00.000+08:00

Current time 2:40 AM just finish drinking tea with my friend, main topic is about the way of helping me, they are so great, luckily i still have at least few of those friend or i really will be dead. Before i start my conversation with friend, Thomas drive me out to a car wash at kepong bhp, free car wash by machine, quite fun and nice, he get scolded by those guy because of slow. Simple cleaning at outside, simple cleaning inside, i still can see a bit dust, so what? It is free, still need to complain a lot? His car, he got two car, i name it grey and orange, orange is his main car, the drive out grey one. His grey car is damn sucking dirty and shit, i don't think a simple washing will clean off those thick dust. So dirty. Our conversation is so damn long just now, so many hours of my story. What am a scarying now is my money, please don't finish before i get a new job, i still need money for engaging my job at outside, search and find it. My friend suggested and commented me a lots of job, worth and nice to think. Genting card shuffler, need to have skill and more, taxi driver is really not a bad job, monthly and daily earn quite lots, the important is must hard working, what's more, lorry spare part, learning and work those job, private car driver, LOL stupid. They suggested me damn lots and they are trying their best to help me. I don't put my hope on parent and i don't need their support, i have enough of their kindness and goodness, they are only a normal parent that support me a house and food. Not really don't give support, example a simple jia you also don't have, no offences but they are really, A unique parent. All people will laugh and shame on them. By the way, today i found that Estelle, a friend in my facebook, reading my blog post no facebook note :p it is a bit itchy and shy when she read my blog post, she will know a lots about me, even one of my friend that is free to online also don't care a damn on my blog link. Estelle, work hard and don't be lazy, jia you :) i am a bit tired right now because it is not early now.. Last word. Elric, it is very obvious already, give up and do your best in life, it will not be easy, so i have try my best.

28-05-2009

2009-05-28T13:04:00.000+08:00

Current time 4:00 AM going to sleep after writing this post.. Today, my day is a bit good. I want to fix my window life messenger so much, the problem now is i can't remove the program. I can't install a new one without removing it, software and program things, it is very complicated and hard. I went out to drink tea with thomas, mark, andy and me at 8:30 PM just now or yesterday. Talk quite much and a lot, wasted a chance of job because mark can't contact me when he need me! It is damn stupid, i am going to change to maxis if digi continue disappointing me. I am a bit not sure about what mark work does, need to check him out and confirm it if got chance. A remote car and bring away a human life, believe it or not? I believe in future, remote control model will be a type of weapon for killing. I am quite proud me my friend because they have a very cool and enjoyable life, unlike me, what can i do is blame my parent because of, they are hopeless and don't know what is good for me? I don't trust any living human in earth, i don't even trust myself. Don't care and whatever la. Just now i have a very long counter strike match with my friend, they are very pro and i really can't beat them down, what i need is more training, i can't get use to cc computer, if i use my own house computer, surely no problem. Actually we are planning to watch football till morning, they are gambling so i am not joining them. Their club life is making me dream of it, damn syok but not suitable for me yet. I don't want to face my friend with a moody emo face and style, i laugh and talk + joke with then although i don't really feel fine and well. I already awake, i don't want to dream anymore. I think i should get some sleep and stop bullshitting rubbish. Good night. Keep my problem in heart and stuck it off .

27-05-2009

2009-05-27T13:56:00.000+08:00

Current time 3:25 AM i am sleeping late again. Actually i already start feeling weird since yesterday till now but i know everything will be fine. Word popped up on my mind is "let it be" it is no use if i think so much. My body temperature is damn high now, sleeping at very late time.

I can't see anything, it is so dark and silent, i can't see my hand, i can't hear my voice. No matter how hard i try to scream, there are no sound out from my mouth. I try to clap my hand, i can't listen to anything. Everywhere i look and see, it is full of darkness, i try to run, but i still can get out from this place. Where am i? I feel so lonely and empty, why am i here? My memory is slowly getting weaker, forgetting part by part. I start to ask myself, who am i? How long i have been walking in this world that full of darkness. I feel like, i rather die than being suffered this way. What is my purpose of living, i can't remember at all. I feel so tired of living, my breathing is slowly get weaken, i already don't want to survive, please stop suffering me.

I can choose the ending with, i feel like someone grabbing my hand but, i have no idea on who. I am so sleepy now, good night.

26-05-2009 let it be

2009-05-26T13:22:00.002+08:00

From the very Beginning, the girl's family objected strongly on her dating this guy. Saying that it has got to do with family background & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her life if she were to be with him.

Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrel very often. Though the girl love the guy deeply, but she always ask him: "How deep is your love for me?"

As the guy is not good with his words, this often cause the girl to be very upset. With that & the family's pressure, the girl often vent her anger on him. As for him, he only endure it in silence.

After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies in overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl: "I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?"

The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family finally gave in & agreed to let them get married. So before he leave, they got engaged.

The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas, continuing his studies. They sent their love through emails & phone calls. Though it's hard, but both never thought of giving up.

One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. When she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed. She realised that she was badly injured. Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could come out of her mouth was just a sigh. She has lost her voice......

The doctors says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with nothing coming out from her, she broke down.

During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,.....it's still just silence cry that companied her. Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the phone. Which pierced into her heart everytime it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know. & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.

With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, and countless of phonecalls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying....

The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.

With a new environment, the girl learn sign language & started a new life. Telling herself everyday that she must forget the guy. One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She asked her friend not to let him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.

A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing an invitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in it instead.

When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her. He used sign language telling her "I've spent a year's time to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I've not forgotten our promise. Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You. With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.

25-05-2009 happy birthday to RAVEN LEE XIAO HUI

2009-05-25T00:00:00.006+08:00

happy birthday to RAVEN LEE XIAO HUI

today will be the most special day to RAVEN, [age 18 liao], i made this blog post at very early time and make some edit and add

i added this song is for you, not easy to get this song because title is in Chinese
nothing much to say :D usually chat and sms also say liao
i remember what you tell me on what you want at age 18 :D your wish and dream

RAVEN HAPPY BIRTHDAY

CUTE!!!!!!!!!!

Gift of my friendship....

I give to you a gift of my friendship,
A piece of my heart and soul,
A shoulder to cry on when life makes you sad
Laughter for your silly jokes.

An ear to listen to your concerns,
Eyes to see the beauty of your soul,
Advice when you are at a fork in the road,
And a smile to brighten your day.

All this I give you and more
Because you are my friend.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR FRIEND

24-05-2009

2009-05-24T09:57:00.000+08:00

Current time 1:50 AM on bed now. I am doing some music video organizing and download just now so i am sleeping late. I am chatting with ron, joey and raven too, sorry to you all because me leaving so early.. I need to control myself from sleeping late so i have to sleep early. I make joey angry already!! So what? She is only a little girl in my eye, i will comfort her back and will not disturb her anymore. In chatting, we will never think about ages or anything. When we chat, we will either feel something not right, for some people, they will think it is equal but actually it is not. From my experience of chatting, i have chat with quite lots of people, i have slowly when into those people and know that it is not equal. Last year, i meet a standard six kid, he chat with me quite well but he is standard six, attitude and style, how to say, he is also a kid, i can feel by his chatting. Just share some chatting experience and never try to equal someone of chatting, actually it is different. I am wondering, did meadow went to the gathering today? I will feel VERY left out if she didn't tell me that she is going!! I wanted to go so much but no transport.. It is not impossible if i want to go. A very short post, good night and sweet dream to all my friends and reader if i have some :)

23-05-2009

2009-05-23T15:32:00.000+08:00

Current time 1:30 AM actually i planned to sleep early today but i am still sleeping at very late time, accompanying Joey26 on her share for tohoshinki aka tyqx aka dbsk.. A bit weird right, as known as a lots of name, i call it as dbsk, more main and original on name. Will you think that it will be a bit weird that guy will like those guy singer band more than girl like ayumi hamasaki? I think i will slowly get into dbsk group because they are really cool and great, i already say that my sister will go out to concert with joey26, don't know got chance or not, see first. I think i fall in love with cool joke japanese singer band, those guy are so cool. Temporilary i guess, i want to see and hear more of them just like dbsk. Actually today my mood is a bit down because i know that someone is going to thailand on june, although it is only four day three night, i feel like a bit worry on her.. I hope that she can at least online few minute, let me know that she is okay at thailand or something.. Down like crazy.. Today is a very regretting day, try guess what have i done.. I slapped Shirley in instant message chat.. I writee "piak", very regret.. Promise to myself not to give her any hit word. She say she will remember the date of today and time, she want to beat me up so badly too, listed up a lots of people name that she say she will complain. I rather let her pinch and beat forever. I will pray for her safetiness on thailand, macam mau.. Few day only la. Must snap a lot a lot photo too. Going to stop writing, okay then, good night.. Current time 1:50 AM

22-05-2009 complicated unbreakable chain

2009-05-22T10:28:00.003+08:00

don't know why i feel a bit weird, it is not ordinary and i know there must be something wrong into me. normally people will feel a bit pressure in heart till cant breath but i am not.. i am not expecting anyone to read the previous long post but i hope that.. i hope that at least she can understand or know something, whatever.. i don't really care a damn or something, my blog don't have fans so it is okay, so damn complicated and stuck.. i hate feeling down, i hate feeling vandalizing. i am so so complicated. short post.. attention to previous post :(

22-05-2009 girl

2009-05-22T10:16:00.001+08:00

Current time 12:50 AM just come back from drinking tea with friends. Just asked them about genting trips date and time, they can't really confirm which day because the schedule they got is a bit complicated. Waiting a free coffee in genting. Just now when i arrived, Mark is on the phone with her girlfriend. Mark is the one that i know the most longest from standard five, i know him very well but the most complicated things about him is i need to believe every word from him.. Something things he say will make people feel like he is lying but actually he don't lie, we will know if he joke, he is a very honest guy. When he is on phone with her girlfriend, try guess what is my reaction with Thomas.. We are shivering with those word that mark say and of course it is not weird to us, we are chillies mean hot, he is candy, you know what it mean, sweet, LOL. Thomas don't seen to be accepting those as sweet, he say Mark girlfriend is damn annoying. For me, it is okay, i feel like asking Thomas borrow his phone, i want to call a girl and prank her on phone, she will never know it is me because the image that i have, in her eye i am a coward. I don't mind about that, promise you guys that i will prank her on phone. Wonder will it work or not, i will never reveal myself that i am the guy that prank her till i really need to reveal then only i will say. Today my mood is very good, i talks a lot to them because they don't have anything to say, slowly intro some pass story and cars. Thomas is quite lonely, i can be by his eye, only games that accompany him, luckily he have money and a group of gang that always active or he will feel very sorrow. Actually i am planning of offline early and sleep early, at last i am still sleeping at this late time, writing blog on phone and waiting to publish. The world is very reality, let me ask you a question "you and your friend" one of you both need to die, i am wondering, who of you two will stay. If me, i will choose myself to be dead, will my friend say "no, let me die" true is, they will not say that. This is a made out question, everyone can make a lies on it, the true of human only will be reveal only when it happen. A car accident, the car is going to explode and your friend stuck inside, if you can't pull it out, you will die, if you runaway, you will be safe. I am dumb, i will try my best to safe my friend. I am stupid, in real life, it is not worth for that. Whatever. People always human that is K, their heart is always fragile, maybe it is true. You will always hope for someone happiness but what about our self? Every unwellness swallon by own, feel by own. Have you all try, biting your teeth tight and hold yourself from crying? This is emptiness. There are something that i want to blog out but don't know why i can't. I am not scare because she will read or anything, just the feeling is stucking quite hard and difficult to explain and blog out, there are too much and so suffering. I am not expecting her to read this part. You know i like you, you can act nothing, i can act silent, i don't hope for any answer, i don't wish for anything, i just what a test of exam to myself. And lastly try not to act don't know. Thats all. My friend is asking me to go to secondary school carnival, of course i will agree to go with him, although that i like older girl but actually i quite like student, after all, i am single. Silly me, young girl don't seen to be attractive to me but older girl that have a young heart is quite cute and attractive. Too sad that i don't have much chances of meeting older girl, only one. Wait i minute, i start to like today blog.. Nice! I can comment something about girl that i like, a lots more. Darn, i am a bit tired right now.. There are someone that i want to mention, C, she is a very cute young girl, too sad that she is younger that me one years or i will after her. Actually we have chance to be together i guess, she asked me out to a date too.. C is a very mini short cute pretty girl, eye very round and big too, can count as type that i like. Last time i always think, if we like someone, we will don't care anything or how it look. Girl that i like, long straight hair, thin and small, shorter than me, have a very sweet smile, eye must big and round, talkative, very active and smart, the most important is kind and ting hua, don't make me worry about her. Whats more, must always report me when there are something happen to her, tell me each time when she is happy, sad or moody. Tell me her daily story everyday. This is type of girl that i like. No girl that is perfect in this world, girl that i like doesn't match with my taste, oh well, never mind, what to do if i already fall on her, accept the fate. Just now my friend fetched me back, they suddenly say they heard that i have girlfriend already, my reaction is like shit, they found it already but the true is i don't even have one. My friend is very stupid, they will advise me to beware of fat girl that will rape me when i am walking to home, on staircase. I forget my blog birthday and when it made, what i know is, it is on may. Poor blog. Shirley thinks that i am type that very easy to believe people, sorry, i am not, i always suspect and think that my friend is lying, i always suspect everyone is lying, i don't trust myself, i don't trust anyone, do you noticed that i always ask a word, "sure?" I am sick again, my heart will beat when i think of you, my face will red when i look at your photo, i will feel that you are there when we are texting. This is a very long post, whoever that readed this can make a wish to me and i will grant it. A wish that i can do it of course, i will do anything. This is a promise to this post reader. Okay then, time to sleep, current time is 2:15 AM good night and sweet dream. Meadow, oyasumi .

21-05-2009

2009-05-21T10:54:00.000+08:00

Just now my mother say something about my job again when i am not online and sitting at a comfortable sofa. She is asking me to get temporarily job. She is too free, nothing to say when she is ironing my sibling school uniform. Get scolded by me with a very acceptable reason till she speechless. If my father is awake on dining room, a war will begin again. My parent don't understand and misunderstand me, this is the reason of war. I believe in future, my sibling will have same war that i am having. Trust me. Lets say something about my blog, i love my blog to be silent in public, i want to change my blog themes colour to bright and dark. I want it to be very nice too. Helped Raven fulfiled her dream on blog, actually i like to have a very special blog templates but it is not easy to manage, a lots of edit need to made because i want my blog to be unique. I am wondering, hey Shirley Soon, want me to make you a black and white fairy dust background for blog? Please.. It will be very nice. By the way, bright and dark mean black and white :p actually what colour do i like? Red and black or only black? Today Shirley tell me that she hates pink, i don't think she really mean to hate pink. Pink is sweet, gentle, kind and cute, i think Shirley feel geli with this feeling so she hate pink but actually i think pink colour quite suit her actually.. She can be very gentle by loving pink colour. Every colour that a people like will have a meaning behind, no one really hate a colour, just dislike. I belong to colourless so it mean i am a very blur guy. Raven love green, if she like dark green, it bring emo and grey feeling. Haha, she like emerald green and all green. I am not a professional colour explainer so i am not accurate and real. Shirley likes black and white, it is lame :p it sound lame but actually it can be very nice too. Today my feeling not a bit good so it bring speechless me out, a bit only. Question, why i want you to dare me, you don't dare me, why when i feel nervous, you purposely make me more nervous and dare me? Pity guy got unsolvable question. I hate myself of being say (emo) it is me and it is the true me and it is my style, who cares. No offence to anyone. I know quite lots friend in facebook, i want to be famous to all of them :p get their responds and respond them, disturb their post and more, it is so fun. Going to sleep, so tired, current time 1:35 AM good night

20-05-2009

2009-05-20T11:16:00.001+08:00

So many day didn't write something about myself already. Actually i am feeling quite fine nowadays or should i say i am feeling complicated? Hard to explain and it can't be explain. Never mind that. I am starting to sleep late and feel a bit fun on night time.. It make me feel down too.. Time to write about friends~ i heard Raven tell me that Joey broke up with her boyfriend already, Joey is too young for love and i don't think she is serious too.. She might feel pain and sad but it will fade very quick and soon. I hope that she can be fine and will be fine. I didn't chat with her for a long time already and she don't seen like mixing me up too. I will chat with her tomorrow. Ron, back like always and chat now, be myself and be hims self, chat like always and be friend, it make me think of me and hamburger situation.. I think he already forget me completely, only remind will make him think of me. I think i can understand how Ron feel on his life, i got checked his blog so i know a bit of him. From what i have know, he don't have confidences with his friendship, thats all. He have friend, it can be few or it can be a bunch, i don't know.. Just be confidence on it. About Ron love problem, you better don't think about it first, this is my advise IF YOU DON'T REALLY HAVE LOVE TO ANYONE. Chat with him tomorrow. Mimpi burung menjadi kenyataan, haha, she own herself a green color blog with her wish and request. Don't know why from small to now, i am very RELA on helping people, see people got problem, i will busybody.. Talk Raven things first, i am so jealous with her blog!! How come it can be so nice and green, she is having the most unique blog in the world, thanks to elric of course. Nothing much to say about Raven, everyday chat and sms ma. Chat tomorrow. Say about joey now, another joey in facebook, she is a japan song lover!! Cool!! She have share me a lots of song and it is really nice!! Haha. She uploaded her student art work to facebook, it is really very nice and creative, i got a feeling of touching too when i see those kid artwork. Habis cerita joey. Now Shirley Soon punya cerita, short short only la, i hope that she can go for her gathering in alamanda at saturday, actually i wanted to go too but i need to stay one night at Shirley house :D night time go back to kepong very dangerous ma. I know she don't mind :) mimpi got la. I will try to help her on this. The problem is transport and her mother permission.. I don't mind if i can fetch her. Pity girl. Chat tomorrow. Elric, today his mother ask him to change the kitchen light so he must climb up high, actually elric is scare of high.. Not very scare but very very scare. Haih, i can choose not to help but what can do if auto respond? Hold on a second. I need to tell meadow this :D today i request meadow to give me her father phone number because i want to help her call her father to fetch her.. She is busy so i request to helped her. I already hold up my phone and start pressing those number, i am a bit nervous and weird why the number so familiar.. Huh.. It is her number~ she keep on asking me call la :p sorry for being so coward, you macam cabar me and think i don't dare. I like to prank people on phone :D my another personalily attitude, a playfull me. I will prank meadow with public phone or friend phone so wait and see. Wait la you. Raven also will kena. Next story. Today i add Shirley ask friend in facebook, Shirley Chu, a girl that i like last time, now don't like already because it is old story. So coincidences that she have a same english name with meadow. She accepted me as friend in facebook, viewed her profile and know that she break up already? Not my problem la. I want to add a lots of friend and i want to comment all their post too. Current time 4:30 AM tired and good night, last word, sorry for my english, tired..

20-05-2009 HATE ME

2009-05-20T02:47:00.008+08:00

HATE ME
JUST CLICK THAT IF YOU HATE ME, I DON'T MINE
I WILL ONLY BE VERY DISAPPOINTED

DON'T KNOW WHY I FEEL SO DOWN WHEN I AM STAYING LATE AT NIGHT.. SEE I FORGET TO UPDATE MY BLOG AGAIN.. I PROMISE MY FRIEND AND EVERYONE, SAY THAT I WILL UPDATE MY BLOG EVERYDAY.. THIS SIMPLE THINGS ALSO I CANT DO SO NEXT TIME HOW?

HATE ME
YALA I KNOW YOU WANT TO CLICK, CLICK LA, CLICK ALREADY DONT ADMIT ME AS FRIEND, IT IS OKAY THAT YOU CLICK, I DONT SCARE, IF YOU REALLY CLICK, DONT KACAU ME LIAO

HATE ME
GOING TO SLEEP, 3AM ALREADY, CLICK IT AFTER FINISH READING :D

18-05-2009

2009-05-18T23:47:00.003+08:00

Become a wind, unfathomable distress.
I'll hold back your loneliness.
The two of us are a bracing wind, oneness.
Even if this world comes to an end, I won't leave you.

Deep within my rusted memories,
I feel like you cried out to me,
just as if our very cells yearn for each other.

When two souls that have shed their loneliness
embrace and melt into one,
from out of loneliness, love is born.

Burst into flame, distress that blocks the way.
I want to burn the darkness of the past.
Our hearts are, yes, endless.
A real miracle is right here with us.

If by chance we're ever separated,
I'll probably be a mere shell of who I was,
like a swan whose wings have completely floundered.

It's OK to show you can bare your loneliness,
healing the pain with your lips
until a rose blooms in your heart.

Become a wind, unfathomable distress.
I'll hold back your loneliness.
The two of us are a bracing wind, oneness.
Even if this world comes to an end, I won't leave you.

When souls that were born along with loneliness
are brought together by fate, and melt into one,
eternity begins to flow.

Burst into flame, distress that blocks the way.
I want to burn the darkness of the past.
Our hearts are, yes, endless.
A real miracle is right here with us.

Become a wind, unfathomable distress.
I'll hold back your loneliness.
The two of us are a bracing wind, oneness.
Even if this world comes to an end, I won't leave you.

17-05-2009

2009-05-17T11:57:00.002+08:00

this is a song i upload to facebook, i put it here by embed code.. just some share :D i like this song so much, it is so nice is it a bit sien if internet speed is slow nothing to do, short post, edit and update more later la~

16-05-2009

2009-05-16T11:14:00.004+08:00

I understand myself more well than others know about me, i can have a lots of attitude and personality. I can suddenly be a very talkative guy but actually i am quiet. The real me in heart is actually not a quite person, don't know who is the one that say she understand me so well. I am type that like to joke and entertain people, i use to be a laughing machine that ticke people. My mood is the things that causes my change and more. How i hope i can maintain my current mood, it just can't be long. I have made few post comment with people, making them feel that i am type that very friendly and nice, they will never know that i am a quiet person or more. I gave wrong personality to meadow already but never mind, who care~ the purpose me making this post is, just want to tell you all, my mood now is good and nice. ELRIC never like's his parent, is he a bad son? People say parent are always right, i feel like get murder by them. Don't care this two people first, making me sick. When i am feeling down, most of the time i will be very quiet and speechless, remember this and don't think i am a boring guy, i will disturb and ask a lot if my mood is good. Y!AM is a new world for me, it can be nice if i make question but my level is too low.. I need the thumb casting ability so i can't ask a lot, level can't ask if my point is low. Now i remember that i am a new Y!AMmers there, may 5 join, i remember i passed by the question before, maybe it is my old email. I love facebook, it is so wide open and social in net. Actually i am making this post in phone so i am going to sleep now or i will wake up late again, WAKE ME UP!!

15-05-2009 direction founded

2009-05-15T01:53:00.003+08:00

Is there anything that we can do if we are not feeling sleeping at midnight time and we are online?

my question is [is there anything that we can do if we are not feeling sleeping at midnight time and we are online?] i dont play game to spent my time, only online.. i feel a bit empty and nothing to do.. is there anything i can do? current time is 1:30 AM i hope there are Y!AMmers online at late time :)

i dont think you all can get what i mean because no one can get what i want to mean :) just share something that i dont want to forget, keep as memory and share something that no one can get. i made a question in Y!AM after back from drinking tea with friend, dont feel like sleeping :) i know what i want and i see some direction of my life now. i need to own a transport, motorcycle :) i dont care and i am going to ride a motor or get a car quick. work, say it will be simple, huh? need to think about transportation and the amount on what we spent, this what blocked me. [I AM GOING TO TAKE A MOTOR LICEN TO DRIVE MOTOR FOR MY LIFE AND WORK SO WISH ME GOOD LUCK, I WILL BECOME VERY DOWN IF I FAIL TO OWN A MOTOR AND A LICEN, NEED A LOT COMFORT, BE SURE YOU HELP ME JIA YOU OR I WILL HUG YOU TIGHT AND CRY UNTIL YOU CRY WITH ME] i am feeling damn good now. a motor and i licen, must wish me good luck on that!! short post :)

at last i have found something, i know what job should i get and some direction now :D thanks to tun bobo because of helping me a bit and thanks a lot for the resume that edited by lenglui s~, shh.. later she ter-rase. thanks for bird too, she give me a stick to stand up when i fall down. thanks my friend the most, saving me from hopeless human. good night and sweet dream, going to off after awhile, night!!!!

14-05-2009

2009-05-14T22:58:00.002+08:00

my current mode is a bit okay because everything have fade, it is just for today. a short daily update before i go out to yamcha.

Pale broken wings,
you're just a little tired
from the sky which is too blue
Don't do it for anyone else
Just smile for yourself

loneliness is still creeping up,
A candle lit up inside
totally incompatible with a splendid, bustling party

The hollowness of
the absence of your words, is it ok just to bury them?
I still don't know

At least within dreams
If I can swim freely even if there isn't anywhere like that,
Even if everything until now is forgotten,
Even if I can face tomorrow...

Pale broken wings,
you're just a little tired
from the sky which is too blue
Don't do it for anyone else
Just smile for yourself

The peacefulness of inferiority
won't come true so simply
Settling above your self consciousness
A petal reflected by a mirror

Straining my lungs,
tryin' to call dirtied love,
however, it's so frustrating

As times are passing
My wounds are cursed
My scabs are changed
You haven't got that
So beautiful
Yet so short lived

After the scabs fall off
Just like the newer, shorter hair near the scar
My prayer are shaking in the bright light
I won't forcibly
try to love you...

Sometimes, in this world
When we try to walk ahead,
it's a little too bright, isn't it?
It's like we're sinking
When we feel like giving up,
the dry land sucks up our tears

Why do we feel so alone anytime?
We don't have to take it all, you know
Why do we feel so alone anytime?
Simple refrain isn't courage

good night!!!!!!!

13-05-2009 smiling with sadness and tears

2009-05-13T14:59:00.002+08:00

i might look normal and nothing in my appearance, normal in texting, my friend or parent will never know, i cant breath, i can smile, i can laugh, i can talk, i can joke, i can act, i can be nothing. i can don't care, i can just do nothing. everyday, every night, every moment every minute, what am i doing now? whats my direction of life, what is my target? i am lost, i am inside a dark room, i cant run far, i don't have anywhere to go, no matter how loud i scream, no respond. i want to do it alone, i don't want any help, can i? feeling heavy, is this what we call stress or pressure? i am relaxing in home, do you think i am so relaxing?

enough~

my sister wear glasses, look mature, grown up and lenglui, cool?

lalala, enough post can write

13-05-2009

2009-05-13T12:51:00.000+08:00

12-05-2009
a date of day that i forget to update my blog again. Actually i already have the prediction and know that i will forget to update my blog at this day. This morning i waked up by a call from my boss, i already enough of those stupid work and i don't want to return to the place. Online at 9am if i am not wrong, meadow absent today.. How is her, is she fine.. :( i do quite lots of thing today but i still can't really hypnotize myself. My facebook wall is full of the quiz i take. Today is so empty.. Did i mention something about (it is not that simple) wait a minute, hold on a second, i am typing my blog on phone. There are an touching scenes, just now i went to old town in cheras with my friend, we drink our tea there, when we are about to drive back to bryan house, mark noticed that he left his key at old town.. We are suggest to drive back and get back the key. It is not early and we are about to reach bryan house, only in front and thomas say he want to throw us down first but we all say, just go together. There are 5 of us here, unbreakable relationship, very strong. A relationship that we have is not simple to be build. I understand this very well. Not going to sleep tonight.. Blogging until morning and online to publish this blog, current time 4:18 AM (i understand that it is not simple, not giving up already, just..) hope that i can go out and search for a job successfully tomorrow. I am not going to wait for studying anymore, wasting time, why don't i get a job that can learn something for the use of my future. I really don't have direction anymore, straight away get a job quick, target, get a job before june. Frustated, what the hell, i will pinch you if i see you, scold you until cry, i mean it. Sorry. I want to punch my hand on wall until i feel pain or enough. I want to scream out loud like crazy and abnormal, yell with tears falling! F*ck my life of! Whoever that want to beat me up, come, you will be dead if you can't fight me down of i can sure that your head will bleed. Kill me if you can or you will be the one that killed. JOB! I need one. I want to punch hardly to the wall, i want to see the wound at my fist. I want to feel empty. I am home now, 4:45 AM not going to sleep. I feel so tired and exhausted, i can collapse if i run or do some exercise. I don't want to lost things that i like. My head is going to explode.. Feel crying but my tears stuck.. Can you answer me HOW ARE YOU! Dead! Feeling dizzy, need sleep. I don't want to see my parent wake up, i don't want to see my siblings wake up for school, i want to finish my blog but i don't have the time. I am feeling so down.. I need someone to accompany, not to talk, just someone with me. Me and my friend relationship are strong but they seen to have another gang already.. I am disqualified. I am alone, i saw a photo of their new gang friend in thomas desktop, it is damn sweet and great, more happier than five of us. I know, i have been disqualified.. Never mind this. Other things now. I think i really falled to you and it is 100 % true.. EXHAUSTED i don't want to delay this post! I want to done it before i sleep or online. Okay now, i am done.

11-05-2009 hoo pui yee birthday

2009-05-11T20:58:00.004+08:00

short birthday celebration

11-05-2009

2009-05-11T14:59:00.003+08:00

i don't want to have any instant message or message sending contact for a moment

A nostalgic smell
flutters in the wind
even though you burned out
and are no longer here.
Since then, my heart has been
an eternal white Arctic night.
I cannot love anyone like that.

Loneliness together with loneliness--
a traveler and a traveler.
The momentary midsummer
that enveloped we two.
Even now, in my hands
your weight and warmth sighs...

I wish I could have given you life.
But why is it that I alone am alive like this?
Look down, please, from somewhere in
the sky, on this way of life
that does not embarrass you.

Loneliness together with loneliness--
a traveler and a traveler.
It was a parting we could see
from the time we first met.
Believing in the day when we can meet,
far off in time,
I wander in the white Arctic night.

i cant write that good word, i hope i can write it out one day

11-05-2009 broken wing

2009-05-11T10:33:00.003+08:00

today is my sister birthday, i don't feel anything and i cant feel anything. yesterday my father get some Singapore dollar from European and he is so happy and excited about it. money is my father eye is so high and important to him, he rather use money that can support me study for gamble. i don't what is he thinking, he born in 1966 and the age he is having now, suppose to be very mature and know how to think. i wonder, how do he rare me grown up with a thinking that he is having. okay now, last night my father buy a present for my sister in KFC, it is a happy meal but i cant feel any happy things flowing around. my father even bought a cake last night, i am so damn shy and don't dare to go near. what so shy? my father is so busy today? why must he buy a cake that early and his mind and thinking is (cheap and delicious cake, especially small) i don't mind if he want to safe money or celebrate it with simple way but he don't seen like knowing anything about birthday celebration. i am not going to celebrate my birthday forever with them, birthday is not happy and nice to me anymore, it is a nightmare because a birthday that don't have any feel of birthday, it is something like faster end the process of blowing candle and singing song. i hate birthday and i don't like birthday. to my sister, i feel so pity and sad to her because she have this kind of father, i can sure in future, my father will be the type that hate by every human on heart. he cant understand a things and he cant accept a things. last night before i went out to cheras with friend, my father get mad because my mother say "so late already why still let my sister hang around and letting her sleep" my father straight away fly of the newspaper and say bad word and more, he say "it is not my responsibility and how i know that she need to sleep? this small things also want to say me" my father is damn stupid useless and i hate him so much

last night my Thomas asked me to go out, he say he will be going to cheras at 10pm so i wait him in house. charging my phone and sms with bird, bird mood is not good yesterday.. why.. don't know. i waited my friend from 10pm and they arrived at 12am. actually i already dont want to go and want to get ready to sleep but i dont have work to do, if they ask me out at anytime also, i think it will be fine and alright plus i dont want to be left out anymore. they arrived at 12am and asked me to wait from 11.30pm. last night i think a lots of thing in half hours time of waiting before 12am.. things that i think is.. never mind then, it is nothing that important to blog it out. last night, the time from 11.30pm to 12am i am waiting my friend at downstair, there area lots of wild dog wondering around and barking and searching for food, those dog are quite fierce, luckily then dont care me because i just look at them. thomas is the one that fetches four people to cheras, he is a driver for last night, max speed is until 160km/h is it fast? i still cant feel it yet because he drive auto gear car. his driving skill is quite dangerous and i can die with them if the lorry didnt give him way last night. elric, thomas, mark, bryan and andy, five people went out, four of us go to meet bryan that stay in cheras, we are a very good friend since from form2, two of the friend is from standard4 i guess. we walked to a place to drink tea, thomas order big watermelon juice and roti telur add bawang, bryan order orange juice and roti kosong, mark order roti kosong and big orange juice, me and andy drink lime water. we talk quite lots last night, much of it is about me of course, i am the most useless among all of them. in four of the friend there, my subject is the most greatest and coollest of course, two credit for english and science. how do i say it to start, we all start our conversation by asking what are we doing now. thomas is doing his own lorry delivering business, mark work as store manager in dont know what company and he is currently studying about computer with bryan. andy is studying about hotel management. me? eat and sleep in home of course, at first i let them nag and scold for awhile, it is impossible that a friend will dont dare a friend staying in house and doing nothing. i slowly telled them that i cant study or get a work in the moment. study is quite impossible to me because there are a human on earth that call father to me. i believe that no one can console him and make him understand because he just cant accept the true about the important of studying, he is a bullshit. none of my friend believe what have i say about my father, there are no paren on earth that dont want its own child to study, i hate my father and i want to kill him a lot, stabbed him with a knife with my own hand, it feel so relief and nice but what for? i killed him doesnt mean that i can study, it only will worsen my image and life. all of my friend last night tolded me and asked me to study and dont waste my time and i am not type that cant study. it is quite hard to talk with them last night because normal human will think, if i want to study, who can stop me but i really have been blocked and begged for dont study. mark say, dont waste my result and go for study, dont quarrel with my father and slowly console and tell him, i can swear that my father will never understand even if i jump of from building now, i hate him so much and i will never forgive him even if he really changed completely to a good person. in future, parent will be my enemy of life, i will try my best to move out, live alone. i tell my friend my father dont understand about studying and the important of a cert, sometime he act, if want to study then go to those cheap place and get a cert, i dont mind about getting a cert at anywhere but next day, "study is useless, when come out to work, salary will be very few and it will raise very slow, if can get approve to work, will waste this and that" his mind is 100% negative and on bad way of thinking, i am so damn angry when i talk with him, he cant get what human say because he is a shit. i already so speechless to this piece of shit and i already give up of it, i want to get a job quick, safe enough money for my life. he is a shit. at last, my friend still dont really helped me but i must thanks them a lot because of giving me such an affection to my life and future.

meadow, can you tell me what to do next? i am really losing my direction in life, i dont know what to do. i will not be able to do anything if i continue stucking like this, online 15hours a day, i can crazy if i continue my life this way for more than a month. i cant do anything if i dont have my own transport, i dont put a hope on my parent anymore because they are totally hopeless and useless. by the way, i am not sure that whether, have toy read what i reply you on blog? i dont know what am i after to.. speechless

going to end my post, is this a long post? it is just some express and some of my story......................................................................... make more post later if i got something to write

10-05-2009

2009-05-10T18:32:00.002+08:00

[LINK] a post that cant be forget..

it wil be a short post i guess because i am having my dinner now and i have to go out later then come back and go out again.. thomas called me just now.. every sound that made by phone, i just cant.. it make me think of.. darn.. someone woked me up this morning :p i will revenge if i go the chance, i cant have a nice sleep last night because my phone is so noisy.. my phone will be automatically logged in to YM when i sign out so when got people IM me, i will receive sms.. i dont off my phone of set silent mode during my sleeping time.

i need some comment for my header in chatbox :) my new header..

today i start some answer in Y!AM already, i think i will slowly join and active there :) hope can make more friend but i feel like the place is a bit quite.. not much response and question..

Raven took the "How well do you know Hoo Yik Yang?" quiz.

Raven's score: 87%
you are the one that i know can get 100% i am so disappointed, dont text me liao!! if you are facebook user, click on the link to try the question, it is not easy too..

when day time's turn to night
when the moon, shine's bright
when you tught in tight
when everything's alright
sleep soflty to the place
when secret thought run free
there come face to face
who you want to be so
swim across the ocean blue
fly a rocket to the moon
you can change your eye
or you can change the world
make a change
dont be afraid
life, is your to live
take a change
and the the best is yet to go..
make a wish..
it's up to you
find a stream inside
then watch your dream come true
you can be a shooting star
but magic right there in your heart
close your eye
believe
and make a wish~

i always hope for happiness
it finally fullfill my wish
cause i just need, to see you smile~

it is a song lyric that i type my own because i cant get the original lyric.. okay then, i got to go, dinner is cold already.. have a nice day to ELRIC :( bye~ post end!!

09-05-2009 stuck up post

2009-05-09T18:52:00.003+08:00

Your account is now blocked

Saturday, May 9, 2009 7:45 PM

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hyikyang@yahoo.com
_________________________________
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You account on Warez-BB.org has been banned.

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______________________________
this is so damn stupid okay, the forum dont even contain the topic in it and why must they ban me? i am a loyal visitor in the forum okay? this world is really suck~ luckily the didnt ban my IP so it mean i can still break in and register a new account. i need the website to for my PC.
___________________________
dont have much thing to blog but feel like want to blog..

it is a saturday again, today i am so boring, have a very weird dream too.. chatted with few people today, they are quite nice and telled me a lots of thing, thanks to them that i am feeling better now. dont know i cant just stop awhile on thinking something, it is driving me crazy. this blog post cant be forget.. hope that meadow will check it out..

simple normal daily post.. share you all some clips.. it is a very sad clips and nice song, i add the original mv with it too

09-05-2009 dream

2009-05-09T08:46:00.002+08:00

my dream for today, almost forget complete, still got few part

i got three adult video in my house
i didn't bought the video
the video contain different things when i buy
this dream is just like few week dream
so i take the disc to change at pasar malam
i choose very long
cant decide what to get
picked few anime to choose but didn't buy
at last, spended my money on junk food
on my way back
i saw my boss with his van, miss him i guess
i still can think of someone even i didn't see it in dream
so i have bought a junk food back
next part of dream went to school
i am a special student
i have been invited to a teacher conferences
they talk a lot but i cant hear what they say
suddenly got student interrupt, door is open
so many Indian student, i look at them fiercely but
Indian student don't scare me
when the door is open, i look outside, everywhere of it
hope that i can see her.. i didn't..
i cant see her doesn't mean i..
it can mean by i scare that i can see her so i cant see
saw few Chinese student but not her
so the class have start
all the student go to class..
in a short time, suddenly recess
i don't eat during recess but i am going to canteen
recess time too short..
when i back to class, everyone have their sits
i have to choose but to sit behind..
it is not my form5 class memory, it is new
got one insane teacher come it
i dont know why must i listen song on phone during class
it is quick loud..
the teacher found it and want to take my phone
i just like, shit!! if my phone is away from me!!
haih.. luckily i wake up, i never let my phone away from me, never!!

make new post when i got something to write.. :( today i didnt get to wake up by meadow!! my phone battery dry out.. it is okay and never mind, i am still waking up early. her brother is back today, i hope they can have a great time.. END POST

08-05-2009 daily post

2009-05-08T20:02:00.003+08:00

it is another daily post of mine on blog, update everyday and done care if i am feeling not well or sick. i can feel like blogging every time and day but don't know why i just cant blog anything well. a reply to a blog honestly i don't really understand completely but i understand a bit, remember what have you told me before when you checked something on my blog, from that day start, i already tried my best to be fake and nothing, it just don't work, you might be feeling weird or don't understand why and how, :) just let time fade everything. and make it like normal. if i really want to struggle on you, (it mean i don't understand you) i don't really hold you tight and say i want you or anything. make it like normal. sorry if my writing here hurt your eye. just want to use small front on this. i am not that dumb as you think actually, i act a lot in front of a lot people, no one can really know what i want or think, EVEN that i cry in front of my parent, they just cant get what i mean and just make a mistake on me. actually i can into is not a very complicated things plus everyone will like someone without reason. you are a very strong and a very good girl, i found out that you are quite attractive on a lots of thing, can this be reason that i like you? click here to read more. i dont hope for anything and i cant force you on anything, do what you like and how you think. i don't think that i cant. i wake up a bit late today, no one wake me up.. feeling sick whole day but i cant sick!! must fight it to be strong. feeling very tired and weak for whole day. this afternoon i went out to a clinic with my brother, so many people are there to see doctor, weather is not good so a lot people fall to sick. my sister went to dentist today, her teeth broke inside her flesh.. so horrible.. the dentist say it is fine then fine.. huh..

meadow is sick today :( caught a cold i guess, sleep so late last night.. i hope she will be fine tomorrow, her chat are like nothing today but i know she is not feeling well. "take care yourself well, drink more water and have some rest" i already repeat saying this to you a lots of time because i cant see how are you or know how are you now :( please be fine and dont sick, jia you!!

post end..

07-06-2009

2009-05-07T13:29:00.004+08:00

it is my drawing again, it is a pen drawing so it don't look nice.. pity.. actually i can sharpen my skill by training my drawing skill more but i don't really have the mood or feeling to draw. i like drawing a lot, it is very much.. sketching is my favorite and it is also my weakest way on drawing. there are someone that i am very proud with her drawing, didn't see much of it because she only displayed few. actually there are skill and technique in drawing too so it is not that easy.

i think i should stop everything and make it on next time or chance, it cant be now or after this so just hold it awhile for a moment. i am mind on what i think when i think of it. i know myself don't have ability and i will not have ability for now. it is not right at all. from all the people i know in online world, people than online in house, when i think of myself, i feel like i am the most unique one among all of them. i am not rich and i am not suppose to be the type that can online that long time, even a friend of mine always say he is poor but from what i see, he don't feel that poor to me other than a lucky one.

nobody knows who i really am, i never felt this empty before, and if i ever need someone to come along, who is going comfort me and keep me strong? we are all rowing the boat of fate, the waves keep on coming and we can't escape, but if we ever get lost on our way, the waves would guide you through another day. far away, i am breathing, as if i were transparent, it would seem i was in the dark, but i was only blindfolded. i give a prayer as i wait for the new day. shining vividly up to the edge of that sea. nobody knows who I really am, maybe they just don't give a damn, but if I ever need someone to come along, i know you would follow me, and keep me strong. People hearts change and sneak away from them, the moon in its new cycle leads the boats again. and every time i see your face, the ocean heaves up to my heart, you make me want to strain at the oars, and soon, i can see the shore. i can see the shore, when will u see the shore? i want you to know who I really am, i never thought i will feel this way towards you, and if you ever need someone to come along, i will follow you and keep you strong. and still the journey continues on quiet days as well, the moon in its new cycle shines on the boats again. i give a prayer as i wait for the new day, shining vividly up to the edge of that sea. and every time i see your face, the ocean heaves up to my heart, you make me wanna strain at the oars, and soon, i can see the shore. we are rowing the boat of fate, but the waves keep attacking us, but it is not that still a wonderful journey? are they any of them a wonderful journey?

06-05-2009 horrible sister

2009-05-06T22:34:00.006+08:00

1st video
my sister cant hear what i say when i ask her to come in the room and do homework, you see she hide something under the table then take it out back right, she scare i will steal it to drink, it is only 40second because my phone got error when i record, it got more and funny part.. sorry for my voice in video
2nd video
sorry for my voice in video again, listen carefully what she say, (write the answer first)
3rd video
i am so so sorry for my voice in video and the way i talk, it sound so old and lame plus rough right, i already feel so shy for that so dont comment about my voice, can you? see how my sister get mad and please ignore me in video!! i am so stupid and i am so shy!! better dont watch!! my sister so~
4th video
please dont watch :) please!! i keep this as my memory in public but i dont hope for any comment for it!! shy like hell!! you can comment about my sister but please dont comment about me, forget my living on video, thanks

i take a very long time on this video upload, i am so damn tired and hope that i can have a sleep!! publish it now, good night

06-05-2009

2009-05-06T22:25:00.002+08:00

try guess where i snap the photo from?

06-05-2009

2009-05-06T12:27:00.004+08:00

All my life so many times
I have dreamed that I could fly
Like a bird so proud and free
Where there are no boundaries
Soaring through the endless blue
If dreams came true

I would spread my wings out wide
Let the wind song lift me high
Feel the breeze as it caressed my face
And my cares just drifted away
In my heart of hearts I know
I have been there once before
Close my eyes and in a moment's time
I would find the joy I knew
If dreams came true

Far above the world I'd fly
Shining wings against the sky
Where the air is fresh and sweet
And at last I'm free
Oh, how gracefully I'd climb
Through the clouds into the light
To a place that's bright and new
If dreams came true

Gazing at the distant sky
Have you dreamed that you could fly
Felt the breeze as it caressed your face
And your cares just drifted away
In my heart of hearts I see
This was always meant to be
Close your eyes and with your hand in mine
I would fly away with you
If dreams came true

Far above the world we'd fly
Shining wings against the sky
Where the air is fresh and sweet
And at last we're free
Oh, how gracefully we'd climb
Through the clouds into the light
To a place that's bright and new
If dreams came true

06-05-2009 use emotion icon to write a blog post

2009-05-05T23:47:00.000+08:00

i am so sorry for my the post todaydont you ever make me angry in commentsome post word is just to suit the emotion so don't take it so seriousby the way, it is a bit shock this morningnothing that shock actually, there are something abouti wonder will it be successfull or notso why dont we pray for it, mabye it can success righti hope that everything will be fine to both of my friendactually i am listening music right now while writing post, sing a bitmy mood is a bit nice today, wake up by ownselfi wake up a bit too early this morning, how good if i can sleep late and let someone wake me up by phone, it will be a very funthere are two friend of mind are having some guy problem, i hope they will solve thier pending answer quick, both of them are waiting reply or trying too, keep upi dont really helped them a lot because i got limit on my abilityplease forgive me if i cant help, i will try my best to help my friendthink about last time, i am a bit blur tooi help any people and friend without caring my own willing, am i a bit dumbit is nothing wrong for helping right, helping is always the greatest thing in our life and of course i will always help people when they need mei think i want to offline awhile after updating this post, go to bath and online back laterthis emotion icon stunsuppose to be thissorryokay now, i want to say something about meto all people please dont wentwhat post about me that i shoud make? this is actually a public blogso now ELRIC will start his postdont just sit and read, why dont you all stand up and walk awhile, drink some water and continue readingi have a question, a question that only answer by methis is always a very complicated question and answer will always hidden, only ownself can answerit is nothing actually, everything went quite fineby the way, when is my last outing with friend, go out and drink teait is quite a long time, remember i say there are a couple? both of them is so talkativethat time actually they are quite sweetit is not easy to make a post with animetion icon, so what mail box can do if we can only put in letter? actually we can throw rubbish in it toofeeling a bit dizzy and confuseit is not easy to use emotion for writingyou know what make me angry, those emotion icon turn and become stunjust like the one beside thisdont care about those stun image then, lets write what i wantwhywhy what? nothinglets make our life happy and positivecan idid i tell you all that i see a comet before? if i see one, i will hope for a people happinessmy post, there are something wrong alreadydont care whats wrong, lets quickly done all this emotion posti think i never been to a party beforewhat so nice about fighting or quarrelsimple post, done

05-05-2009 tuesday

2009-05-05T15:54:00.005+08:00

hello all, how are you? i wake up very early this morning because a guy name Kenny wake's me up by phone.. actually i wanted to sleep late a bit but he!! 7.44am already wake me up.. never mind.. wake up for exercise and train muscle.

receive sms from meadow at 8am something, she say, WAKE UP!! huh? luckily she didnt wake me up at that time, not suppose to tell her that i dont off or silent up my phone when sleep. how good if she wake me up, shh.

online from morning to 1pm, chat with meadow from morning, she will be very busy if i am not working, i will disturb her until i get a new work. i am not sure when will i get a new work.. i hope i can study.. i went to factory area today, i hope i can get a job from there and learn something.. nah~ this month will tell everything.. i cant waste my time in home. study or work, what must i choose?

this afternoon i help a bird see something.. things that bird requested me to see, i dont it quite well.. see what do what? secret. it is a very hot weather.. outing sure very tired, i am a bit lucky today, there are some wind blowed me.. cool!! online in cyber for a short time after reach back my living area, with RM1 i can blow free air cond and chat with meadow, worth? of course it is worth

this world is really worse, you know what i see today? i need to wash my eye twice or more, use detol too. i see something that no one can believe.. student having s*x on the roof side.. what the hell? i see the male only, the female lying on the floor.. the guy just start to put himself down on girl, the guy face so pervert, laugh.. when look at me, huh, i want to.. shh.. i straight away close the door and walked away..

make more post when i am free or want, simple post end~

05-05-2009 Sorry you have been tagged

2009-05-05T09:18:00.001+08:00

Sorry you have been tagged
This is a question copy from facebook, edited and remake by ELRIC KAYSER
Please don’t edit the original word and meaning of it, you have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you so please be honest and do it ;) it might waste a bit of your time so please spare me some of your time for this tag okay? Please?

1. What is your full name? (follow ic)
HOO YIK YANG (weird unique name)

2. D.O.B date of birth
08-12-1990 (I hate December)

3. What is my favorite pizza topping?
PRAWN (I didn’t eat before)

4. At a party, what would I definitely be doing?
TALK WITH FRIEND ONLY (I am boring)

5. Favorite childhood game is ________.
POLICE (I like to be police)

6. What body part would I like to get a tattoo on?
NECK (cool)

7. What color suits me best?
BLACK (black only cool)

8. I secretly would like to be a ________ for a day?
DARK ORGANIZATION FOUNDER (I am serious)

9. What is my sexiest feature?
LIPS (because I have a black lips?)

10. If I had 1 day left to live, how would I live it?
I WILL BEG THE ONE I LIKE TO SPENT THE REST OF MY DAY WITH ME (I better suicide right away if can’t)

11. My favorite flavor of ice cream is ________.
CHOCOLATE (it is my favourite)

12. Am I a good liar (I'll tell the truth this time!)?
YES I AM (I don’t mean to lie and make people offend)

13. How old was I when I went on my first date?
IT WOULD BE 19 (early prediction to myself)

14. What country would I like to live in?
PEACE COUNTRY (do you?)

15. What is my middle name?
YIK (what yours?)

16. What time am I usually in bed by?
12AM (trying to sleep more early)

17. What would I be willing to eat for 10,000 dollars?
ANYTHING WITH (I will treat people)

18. Who would I most like to meet?
YOU (who?)

19. How many times have I traveled out of the country?
NO TIME (didn’t travel before)

20. If I was running out of my burning house, what item would I grab?
MY PHONE, I NEED IT TO SURVIVE (that’s all)

21. What is my favorite store to shop at?
BREM MALL (want to go with me?)

22. What am I scared of?
CLOWN (phobia)

23. What would be the perfect present for me?
YOU (a wish to me is my present)

24. How many boy/girlfiends have I had?
COUNTLESS (don’t have)

25. What song would I choose to sing at a karaoke bar?
BRAVE HEART BY WADA KOUJI (I will sing it nicely, cool!)

26. What is my favorite type of music?
LULLABY (soft comfortable bring melancholy feels)

27. My favorite sport to watch is ________.
ALL JAPAN SPORT (they have a very strong spirit)

28. What did I want to be when I was little?
A POLICE (I am thinking it too but)

29. What would I dress as for Halloween?
ANIME COSPLAY ABEL NIGHTROAD (nice?)

30. What is my favorite holiday?
REST AFTER A TIRING WORK (chat with friend)

31. My favorite drink is ________.
BLENDED ICY CAPPUCINO (my favourite!!)

32. Would I go bungee jumping?
SORRY I AM SCARE (I will go if you go with me)

33. I am most happiest when ________?
I GET AFFECTION ( feel left out every time)
If I won the lotto, what is the craziest thing I would do?

34. What is my dream car?
AE86 (stupid?)

35. If I had to eat the same kind of food for a month, what type would it be?
FOOD THAT YOU MADE, ANY (I think I will vomit)

36. What would I name my first child?
HOO (I will let my wife name it)

37. Who is my favorite Disney character?
PLUTO (a dog)

38. Favorite fast food restaurant?
A & W (still got?)

39. What cell phone network do I use?
DIGI (016*******)

40. My favorite show on TV?
DON’T KNOW (gaki no tsukai if got)

41. What was my nickname growing up?
YANG YANG (don’t call me that)

42. What is my favorite movie?
STUDIO GHIBLI (whisper of the heart)

43. What city was I born in?
KUALA LUMPUR (Tokyo)

44. Who is the one that tagged you this?
DON’T KNOW WHICH STUPID (me)

45. Do you like this tag? (be honest)
NOT REALLY (made to kacau people only)

46. Will you tag someone else?
SORRY FRIEND AND YOU (please cooperate a bit, all the one that readed this must be tagged)

04-05-2009

2009-05-04T14:36:00.003+08:00

There is no light that does not pierce the darkness, It is sad but, No matter how much one is filled with affection, There is suffering, Though we do not have wings, Even a small smile, If you believe that is a miracle, You can walk on, Even when tried by sorrow, If you are here, When the day it cannot be bound, Comes That is everlasting, I long for strength, Like that of a butterfly crossing the sea, If battle alone is strength, That is a pity, Despite thinking it is all right, Even if all is gone, As long as the ache inside you heals, Kindness just meets, Even when tried by sorrow, Beside you, Someday the promised day, With arms spread out visits, Even when tried by sorrow, If you are here, When the day it cannot be bound, Comes That is everlasting

Even the light of my own heart trembles with vague uncertainty. I am doubting this world. I have begun to doubt the hearts of mankind. Don't be sad.. Don't mistrust yourself
even a righeteous heart is sometimes unreliable. However, remember the feeling of your mother's tender hand, if everyone gazes upon that han, they will be full and overflow with light.

最近，雨持续不断地长的咒语压制我盛大的感觉并且我不退让的遗憾做我的轰隆摇动似乎更限制由人类善良本性比由黑暗，我在我许下用您的诺言，泪花，我的在小滴的泪花秋天关闭我的眼皮并且认为，并且烂掉的月亮上升了泪花，我的泪花转达一切，并且没有一件事可能从那些逃脱感觉，我看的幻觉我采取从雨的风雨棚的片刻将改变未来; 如果它是您，您接受在两条您的胳膊的那光亮的片刻，是？当我从夜，静寂消失我能听见仅我的呼吸那的什么推挤我今后，但是一个不附条件的债券相似与爱，泪花，我的泪花在小滴溢出，并且夜雾紧贴接近月亮泪花，我的泪花照亮我的脚步，并且我得到我可以得到接近您的感觉，泪花，我的在小滴的泪花秋天，并且烂掉的月亮有上升的泪花，我的泪花转达一切，并且没有一件事可能从那些感觉逃脱泪花，我的泪花在小滴溢出，并且夜雾紧贴接近月亮泪花，我的泪花照亮我的脚步，并且我得到我可以得到接近您的感觉

04-05-2009 empty life and heart

2009-05-04T12:22:00.005+08:00

there are always friend beside you, not one but a lot, when you are feeling down, all your friend will group up and care you, dont think that it is only you in your world, there are a lots that cheering you up, friend will always hope for friend to be happy.

If you become the wind, I want to become the endless sky, When you're petrified by the sound of the violent rain, Strumming my guitar, I'll calm your heart, Come on people, I want you to feel it, Because it's all right if you don't understand right now, Come on people, I'll go on protecting you, With my life- my soul for you, If you lose your way, I'll light the darkness with my smile, If it would heal your sadness, I'd sing until my voice withered away, Come on people, I want you to believe it, I'll never change, Come on people, like the sun, I'll shine on you- my soul for you

Elric dont understand why he is so different from other, he know he is him and cant compare others and he know it is his life and way of living but why cant he.. bitterness. he is always that abnormal or actually he look normal to people? no one can really see my heart. i am elric, i am hoo yik yang, and i am chrollo

end post.. simple and easy

04-05-2009 elric draw a fairy

2009-05-04T01:18:00.001+08:00

finally complete my drawing, meadow suggestion make me think of a simple drawing, fairy~ it is really a very simple drawing and i believe that a lots of people can draw it quick too.. i dont really know how is my drawing because i dont usually draw. i wonder how is it, actually i want to draw it naked because i cant draw the dress well but cincai la.. i will slowly improve my drawing skill..

drawing is not easy, draw with our heart doesn't mean that we can draw well too, it is not the matters of talent because talent can be made my hard working and training. what we need is to draw our best and everything will be perfect

comment comment~ how is it? good night to all~

03-05-2009 photo uploaded

2009-05-03T16:25:00.004+08:00

all the photo of myself, kid time.. till the day that i stop snapping photo..
all uploaded to facebook..

to anyone that need help on anything about PC, please ask me because there are nothing that is impossible for me that i cant know why or fix.

very very boring day, trying to draw and make more quotes at blog bottom
super short post~

my facebook http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1054294126071&saved#/profile.php?id=1487357364&ref=profile
Elric Hoo Yik Yang's Profile

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02-05-2009 Krabi

2009-05-02T13:25:00.004+08:00

Krabi (Thai: กระบี่) is a town (thesaban mueang) on the west coast of southern Thailand at the mouth of the Krabi River into the Andaman Sea. As of 2005 the town has a population of 24,986. The town is the capital of Krabi Province and Krabi district.

Administration
The town covers the tambon Paknam and Krabi Yai of Krabi district, and is subdivided into 10 communities (chumchon).

Location
Krabi is a southern province on Thailand's Andaman seaboard with perhaps the country's oldest history of continued settlement. After dating stone tools, ancient colored pictures, beads, pottery and skeletal remains found in the province's many cliffs and caves, it is thought that Krabi has been home to homo sapiens since the period 25,000 - 35,000 B.C. In recorded times it was called the 'Ban Thai Samor', and was one of twelve towns that used, before people were widely literate, the monkey for their standard. At that time, c. 1200 A.D., Krabi was tributary to the Kingdom of Ligor, a city on the Kra Peninsula's east coast better known today as Nakhon Si Thammarat.

History
At the start of the Rattanakosin period, about 200 years ago, when the capital was finally settled at Bangkok, an elephant kraal was established in Krabi by order of Chao Phraya Nakorn (Noi), the governor of Nakhon Si Thammarat, which was by then a part of the Thai Kingdom. He sent his vizier, the Phra Palad, to oversee this task, which was to ensure a regular supply of elephants for the larger town. So many followers emigrated in the steps of the Phra Palad that soon Krabi had a large community in three different boroughs : Pakasai, Khlong Pon, and Pak Lao. In 1872, King Chulalongkorn graciously elevated these to town status, called Krabi, a word that preserves in its meaning the monkey symbolism of the old standard. The town's first governor was Luang Thep Sena, though it continued a while as a dependency of Nakhon Si Thammarat. This was changed in 1875, when Krabi was raised to a fourth-level town in the old system of Thai government. Administrators then reported directly to the central government in Bangkok, and Krabi's history as a unique entity separated from the other provinces, had begun.

Politics
During the present reign, the corps of civil servants, the merchants, and the population generally of Krabi and nearby provinces have together organized construction of a royal residence at Laem Hang Nak Cape for presentation to His Majesty the King. This lies thirty kilometers to the west of Krabi Town on the Andaman coast.

Traffic
Since 1999 the town is served by the Krabi Airport west of the town. Passing through the town is Phetkasem Road (Thailand Route 4). Many tourists only travel through Krabi town to go to the more popular locations nearby, like Ko Phi Phi, Railay Beach, Ao Nang, Had Yau, Ko Jum, Phuket and Ko Lanta.

EL's post : now only i know there are such a place on earth that call (craby/krabi), it located in thailand. for my knowing, actually krabi is a town name, not a beach.. meadow is going to krabi this june, company trips, what a happy nice trip, i cant go or actually i can follow. steal go. this place really making me dream.
make some advertise on yahoo messenger, pleases do click the picture to have some sample view, i am the one that draw the yahoo icon. actually it is nothing different with using yahoo messenger chat, dont have custom emotion icon only. it is a simple chat things too and it will improve a lot. i am still preferring msn if let me choose.. msn chat is more nicer and brighter. short post.. *yawn* sleepy~ bath after this

02-05-2009 my baby, bye now and forever

2009-05-02T10:59:00.007+08:00

01-05-2009 HOO POH KEONG aka DEREK << he create own english name that have been taken

2009-05-01T20:41:00.002+08:00

my father
he born in year 1966, april21 is his birth date
he live in kampung place during his child age till he get married and born me
he is a very hard working guy, he start to work at age 13 or 14 because he cant study well
he work with my grandfather before too
my grandfather work as carpenter in a very big company, salary very high too
he work hard for motor and car
he already plan to buy house at very young age too.. i dont even dare to think about it
he marry my mother at year.. forget.. marry because of having me i guess
my parent dont have love and dont know what is love
their first child is me.. i got a lots of baby photo too.. too sad that i can scan it out
i am the first son in HOO's family
he is a very good father at very first.. he work very hard for family too
his attitude is so suck and i am very angry with him..
i want to stay away from him forever!!
his attitude is so worse!! done, end post.. lazy to write my problem

01-05-2009 labour day dream

2009-05-01T08:30:00.002+08:00

try guess what have i dream today? it is a very super weird and stupid dream, need to blog it out quick or i will forget it >_< i am a weak in memorize things. last night sheep went to bed before twelve midnight, almost faint in front computer, too tired. meadow must be sleeping very late or early :/ watching movie and TV show. today must jia you!! jia you meadow!!

my dream for today start with going out and wondering, it is a bit blur too.. cannot see any meadow.. my dream is mainly wanted to have meadow in it but dont have. i am still thinking about my work :( i know i can forget my baby with time.. the dream is walk a lot, something like waiting the dream to start about something.. i went to cybercafe.. slowly i walked to a door and a pretty cybercafe cashier guided me to a dark room.. sorry, about the pretty cashier, she is just a pelakon tambahan, nothing to do with her. when i go in the dark room, there are another door behind the room.. when i open it, it is a link to my store ;) thanks to that guide from the cashier.. suddenly saw the boss and he is shock and happy seeing me return and it labour days too!! i am happy to see back all my baby!! when i went to office, i saw the driver, wuahahahaha!! the dream is a bit nice actually, linked from cyber. the pretty cashier i know her from last two year i guess, last time her face so many tou, now no more already. live very near only. stop her thing. dream end, waked up~

i want to make a super post that shows my baby!!

30-04-2009 last day

2009-04-30T22:58:00.001+08:00

I am so happy today, half day more till my last day, i don't feel like snapping a lots of photo but i got a bit miss here. All the stock and book is my friend, i am the one that take care all of them, every scratch that they get i will feel sad, everytime when they need to been deliver, i will say bye to them in my heart. All the stock in store is like my child, i take a very good care of them. Today i have to say good bye and please take care, just call me if you need me and i will always be back to help. My favourite stock of all is books, i will miss them a lot and i will not forget them! They are my heart and soul, part of the important things in my life. As long as i know you are still here and safe, i will be fine. Bye to my baby..

Night post start here, the upper part is a part that i write on morning. Didn't really complete my writing at morning because i am busy with sms and work. My day end so simple today, feel like it haven't end yet. My boss offered me for part time on saturday, i don't want anyone to know that i am not going to study. So hard i make a big lied said that i am going to study, now i am not.

Meadow
We are not harmful to any creature
then why they hurt us?
instead of rain
they pour us bombs
from the helpless sky.
Do not forget my friends
under the grass,
Alexander the Great,
Adolf Hitler, Napoleon Bonapart
and so many heroes are quiet
and they are in a deep sleep.

30-04-2009

2009-04-30T12:46:00.000+08:00

Today is my last day for working, i already tell meadow that i am going to countdown with her but my phone credit finish already. Going to reload on lunch time. Today my boss give me a lots of work to do, it is okay because it is what i like to do, hang is store, check stock. So now, last day, let's say something about my work and more. First day of work, sit in office and sms only.. So boring.. Sms with phoenix. Actually a very first, i thought that it will be a very tough job because of those account things, hard to understand but actually it is very simple. Account and those clerk work, i mean i do all the in this company. My boss is a bit regret for not raising my salary, no one will be as qualify as me that can do everything with low salary. I do so many pose of work with only thousand per month. Honestly, i don't believe all the boss will be same like my boss, maybe my boss is too old or something, normal people will never got this ability to stand him, of course i am no problem with him, i quit my job because of a very hard feeling that make me feel so useless. A lots of my friend like phoenix and meadow support me to quit this job because they know i am suffering from feeling useless. Meadow is the one that give me the most courage on resigning, treat you a cup of coffee okay? By the way, i have made a lots of nickname to friend that don't use to call, for me, i call myself as sheep. Things that i am doing now is a things that i do in first time. Checking chart board. I am wondering how is meadow now, want to sms her so much but i can't send out any sms, must dash to phone shop later. My blog post is a bit overload, write something that not suppose to write, say something that not suppose to say. Get crazy when a meadow turn silent. From tomorrow start, i will wake up late everyday, do you think meadow is free to chat with me from morning? Meadow need to work! Can't wait the end of today. I know i can't send out any sms but i am still clicking the send button ;p I will be dashing to phone shop and reload later. Didn't set any timeline for today post, a bit busy so lazy to write out those time. I want to go home and have lunch.

A post made in work time

29-04-2009 Believe

2009-04-29T20:19:00.004+08:00

Unable to find any words, I instinctively reached out to touch your shoulder
And you, without saying anything, coldly broke free
Because of a trivial misunderstanding, our young love is giving way
I don't want to see such a sad face

Even though your dream may be dissolving, just don't abandon that smile
It's what keeps my own heart glowing

We swore one day to build the future with our own hands
At any cost, on this planet, no matter where on it you are
And now the two of us stand with pained eyes and glances diverted,
But I believe we'll be able to meet again

The starry sky we used to gaze up at together, where so much light streamed through
All the memories of that still won't fade away

If you really listen for it, you'll begin to hear that phrase
in the melody of the flute that was played

And behind the sky, in the tomorrow my heart depicts,
In that same place, I'll be right by your side once more
Surely we'll be together from now on, plunging ahead through these days
Because there could be a meaning to all of this after all

We swore one day to build the future with our own hands
At any cost, on this planet, no matter where on it you are
And behind the sky, in the tomorrow my heart depicts,
In that same place, I'll be right by your side once more
Now the two of us stand with pained eyes and glances diverted,
But I believe we'll be able to meet again

29-04-2009

2009-04-29T13:07:00.002+08:00

actually i am still thinking about it till now, make me think of it everytime when i sms or online, message in bracket send by a friend in sms [Remember x n x who said that u dun really care about frens when u luv somebody? I can see that u r all into luv, even losing two frens at a time, u r still glad bcos ur heart is full wit luv 4 x, u dun bother anything~ u were like that too when u were into x.] am i really that kind of person or actually i am. Ignore my friend because of something, feel very enough if i got someone? So this is what you think to me. X must be the one telling you that i am ignoring everyone, i don't really ignore people, just chat less, the one that i ignore the most is him, none stop talking rubbish about me, every conversation contain a rubbish word. And another things [U dun get what i wrote...? ... x n i r disappearing :/ Last words 4 u is take care... Next time if u r into somebody, dun neglect ur frens too. Lead a gud life.] i feel like x is the one that cause effect on everythings. Next [No... It's not u hv no time to chat wit us... It's u dun chat wit us... U juz tell us about x... Like no topic between u n ur friends anymore... Just x... Can tell but not all the time. This is what neglect means. I say IF, if u failed to get her, ur friends can b ur support n console... But u lost frens when u were after her, n if u failed, nothing left.] is this what Ron tell you or say to you? or actually i am really having problem Ron already dislike me since from x if i am not wrong, keep only discribing the bad me, example always flirt with girl, always chat with girl, always this and that. He should beware on what his finger type before what he think, i ignore him, i got my reason, i don't really ignore other or say other things to other, did i? Joey don't know about it. Don't want to say a lot, Ron, you are so good, good guy that don't backstabing, good guy that don't say bad thing to friend even face to face also didn't say. Sien.

darkness is always the strongest, this is the true and nothing can change the fate that the world will be swallon by evil. There are no hope and future for everything, what should we do or think now is, pray. When will the light bright out? Baka.

Lunch time post.

29-04-2009 MEANINGFUL MSG .........

2009-04-29T07:56:00.005+08:00

No Pain No Gain… Accept the Pain, Future will be Fruitful…

Don't feel the work you are doing is pain, because there will be always a reason for that pain or work.

So face the pain, for the pain you face, there will be definitely happiness a head.

29-04-2009

2009-04-29T07:16:00.002+08:00

from what have i know from my parent, i can slowly list out a lots of wrong and incorrect way of teaching a child, i even scold them when they dare to nag me, you are right, i am wrong but nag wouldnt work to make me become correct if i am wrong. last night my sister scream and cry for headache, her head is getting serious and more serious. my father say [mai cha liao la] stop crying already!! tomorrow i still need to work, pleased you so many time still keep on crying] isnt crying need comfort? my father or both, scold. they will effect my sister a lot when she grown up. a proper educational for kid is very important, parent is the one that create what attitude that we are having. i have see a lots of kid in my 19years of living, only 18years, make it 19. some kid is really very mature, younger than my sister, the way she talk and move, very mature. kid is still kid, they still need a lots or caring and affection. my brother is a bit corrupted still can help of course. short bla post.

so tired, sleepy and no energy, morning wake up, online one hour, exhausted

28-04-2009 ELric HOO YIK YANG

2009-04-28T12:46:00.005+08:00

28-04-2009 ELric HOO YIK YANG
name: HOO YIK YANG, ELRIC, AH YANG, YANG YANG, YOYO, YIK YANG, EL, XIAO YANG YU YANG, MISTER HOO, LIU YU YANG and a lots more
d.o.b: 08th of december 1990
sex: male
location: malaysia, kuala lumpur, kepong, meadow
blood type: O positive
eye colour: brown
hair colour: brown
height: 178 cm
weight: 48kg
hobbies: online, watch anime, sms, singing and more
interest: online, drawing, paper folding, blogging, anime and more
love: meadow
religion: buddhism
race: chinese
speak: english, manderin, cantonese, malay, hokkien, hakka, japanese and more
relationship status: single
flavour: salty
just some boring blog post. I am going to upload a bunch of photo at bottom so please check it out, i will put caption on every photo, photo arrangement is random. Sleep only 3hours from last night. so tired and sleep~
only two people celebrating father birthday, sorry i am not joining it, they sing their own song, blow their own candle, me? eat only
my father very giam siap, cake, one year smaller then one year, opposite~ cincincaicai only la, nothing special, try guess how small is a son cake? wait 08december
my sister cant wait the cake to be potong, she want to eat already, staring at the sweetest part
making wish, [toto, magnum, 3+1D] lai lai lai lai lai, give me a lot money, photo takin on 21april
>_< cute, company de, not mine, cant give you, buy you one next time, it is a puppet lai de o.. got full set, more than 10+ animal i guess
my sister want to play my chatting -_- melayu pun tak tau tulis, mau main chatiing?
alah, dah marah, next time la, next time
see her sui yong, what you want?
you tau malukah? sebagai seorang abang, adik pun tau mop, you tau apa?
so hard working, me how? sit and online only ma >_< i got help
what is she starring at? leng zai?
;p my computer, nothing much to say, rubbish
until now i still cant make it work leh~ haih, how?
my father watching x using my computer, a mouse also dont know how to move, haih, kesian
today i bring this to work, makan la, lu ingat apa
so delicious but not enough. my blog are starting to become dusty even that i update everyday

ELRIC HOO YIK YANG post end

28-04-2009 a very late post that say about my night outing just now and some story

2009-04-28T01:53:00.003+08:00

a night post after going out with friend,
i am very lame. Too silent. Didn't get enough social or actually i have been left out.
Everything's that they talk, everyone that they mention, everyone that is here, WHO ARE THEM, this is what i want to ask. I have been totally left out. I am not feeling good about it, i am too silent and don't know everything's. They wouldn't ask me go out anymore, i am extra, they don't really wanted to ask me out, reason that they asked me out today, i live near. Today before two friend reach, there are another one unknown couple, who are them? What i do is mute. All the people that they mention, who they are? How to i call them? Don't really care. If i get along well with them then it will be okay. First, me and Thomas with one couple. After the couple left, another two friend of mine come. Four person. Actually our heart is linked, very close, a strong relationship already build when me are on secondary. They are asking me out to club, hundred dollar something per entry. If they ask me to pay some share to girl, no thanks. I am thinking, i already lose my job, going to club meet up with a bunch of unknown. I am not rich plus i don't have any work yet. Of course i want to go. Let me think about it first. My meadow ;p nothing much to comment about it, simple and normal ;p secret. Another things that i am so speechless, i don't know what to comment now. Meadow say, i can't do anything already so why must i think so much? Why don't i mix her group if i have leave. Be happy with my life, meadow say don't care what people say because it is my living way, i know myself alright then it is enough. Tell you my current time, it is 1:21 AM now. I hate one person so much now, not because of anything, just it don't treat me as human, example (you see what girl also like la) (you always flirt with girl) (you always watch those porn) (you are a hacker) (don't trust Elric, he can hack) > this effect is enough strong (you got a lot girl msn contact) (you flirt a lot) (you always love girl) you know how lazy am i when i chat with this human? Keep on saying all this stuff to me, i can screen shot a log, don't need copy paste. I feel so lazy to chat with him, i don't ignore him. (you always updating blog) it mean what? I go to club with friend, (you go to pub) (pub sure got sexy dancing) (sexy girl) (drunk people or girl) (dark place, alcohol) everyone know alcohol place don't allowed underage even if you drink juice (ya ya ya, don't allowed underage, this place is so many sexy girl dancing and drunk people) i meet one new friend, it is a girl (you always meet new girl as friend) those bracket word, i already tak tahan reading those that written to me. Every time when i chat nicely, he will say a lots of rubbish in bracket, this is how you say a friend? I ignore you because i am enough of your nonsense. Your chatting way really make me ask you (please shut up) if you don't like me, just don't care me a lot, have some normal chat. What you need is, tell everyone i don't treat you as friend anymore, OR ACTUALLY you must know what have you done? Go to people blog and say every time when i visit random girl blog, i will see HYY. Ignoring you got my reason. AND i don't forget friend when i am in love. Current time 1:40 AM head aching. Just tell me, this (i hate you) done, don't need to say me a lots of things. I am so lazy with you, totally different when i newly meet you. Meadow, what i need to do is leave it? Explanation not work anymore. Meadow, HUGS!! Bye all. Good night and sweet dream.

i have a great time playing counter strike with them, hundred of match till very late, the match improve my skill and almost overtake them. i am weak but actually i am sharpening my skill. this world actually is very reality, only the strongest can survive. what i do, i must be strong on everything.

this world actually is very reality, only the strongest can survive > not for gaming but in real life