06-06-2009 <3

there are a girl call Carrien, i know her not more than a month of time, at first, we don't really know each other, normal short chat on facebook only. we slowly go into some long chat and exchange our phone number. me and her, it is something like fate that have been make out. i use to be a very shy boy, i don't dare to make call to unknown and more but i have called her in a very short time after she asked me. i feel so happy and warm when we are on phone, there are a type of feeling of "i don't want to lose you" actually i never expect that an relationship of couple can out that quick in a short time, honestly i love her so much now. last night, when i am on chat with her, i accidentally make offend with my word. afterward, i call her.. when we are on phone, i asked her "why will you love me" she say it is because of feel. she confessed me that she love me and she requested me to be her girlfriend, it is what guys normally do to girl. i feel so touching and have some short tears falling moment, i feel so happy. Carrien is the only girl that loved me so much, i will promise her to take care her well forever and wouldn't her upset with any matters. i am a guy that not really good in expressing my feeling and i am not very good on talking too, i don't know how to say much of those sweet things. i will never lie her and i will be honest to her. it is my first time, telling a girl on phone that i love her, she is my first girlfriend that i have, i love you so much, Carrien. she asked me a lots of question, it is something like testing me too.. i am a bit dumb and don't know what to answer but of course i got tell her, she like my answer. i will share some question that she asked, "you kissed with any girl before" of course no. she ask me, "do you mind that i take away your first kiss" of course i will answer, i don't mine, she is my girlfriend. she ask me "can i kiss you" after she ask me this, she say "what else if i don't want to kiss you" i tell her that i will kiss her, either in public or anywhere. we planned to go genting and stay one night, only our two, renting hotel to stay in same room. this is what she suggested and ask me, it is okay for me but i am worrying on something. although that i am a dumb guy, i watch a lots of drama, listen a lots of thing and know a lot, even anime got teach, it is too obvious. a couple, in one room, stay over night together, what will a couple do? HONESLTY i don't hope that we will happen anything, i am quite agree on having those after married. what am i worrying about is, i scare that she will *request for it, don't me when i say no, angry with me if i say no, beg me for it or try anything for it* i am really worrying about this when we are on genting. i want to be with her, i want to be together with her. by the way, i ask her out for gathering at time square, i hope she can go with me and have fun with me at there.. i she want to go.. going to end my post

Carrien, we will be together forever, i will make sure that you will be the world happiest girl, although that i know i am poor and i dont really have much ability for much things but i will do what i can and what i afford. i dont know whether will you understand my blog or will you read, what i want to tell you is, lao po i love you

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going to genting together is what we want, i think i am going to genting with her family this wednesday, i am so nervous